You didn't say whether the child was conceived before or after you married your husband. It makes a huge difference.<br />
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If the child was conceived before your current marriage, the biological father is listed on the birth certificate, and the biological father has taken financial responsibility for his child, he should be allowed to see the child.<br />
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If I was to assume that you conceived after marriage, giving the biological father visiting rights is flaunting the affair and disrespectful to your husband. It also puts you in close proximity to a man you cheated with which creates justified distrust. <br />
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As for the biological father's rights, if your current husband's name is on the birth certificate, most states don't care who the biological father was and will not grant the biological father any right.

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Hard to say since you don't specify whether "X" is from a previous relationship (in which case your husband knew what he was getting into) or from an affair during the marriage (in which case no wonder he's a bit testy on the subject).

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Never mind. LOL I guess you mean "X" as "ex", not "X" as in I don't want to mention his name here so I'll call him "X". If he's an ex, then he has every right to see his child, but that doesn't mean you need to spend time with him, too.

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I read it the same way Ernie!

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Yippee--then I'm not totally nuts--only partly acorns!

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I feel that is for you to decide what is best for all. <br />
And write all the negatives and positive and decide what to do from that . And I prayed when I had to let my Son up. <br />
But I feel that is your choose. <br />
I am here to talk to .

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It would have been nice if you and husband spoke about this situation w X in the beginning. In real life no one ever just rides off into the sunset.

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You Ex has the legal right to see his son and the legal obligation to pay child support. You husband sounds like an insecure d*ickhead, in legal terms. This child has the right to know who his father is and create a bond with him unless he is in some way abusive. You husband does not have rel grounds for divorce over this and frankly, Nancy, why would you wan to stay marries to a narcississtic d*ickhead who is willing to do this to your son? This is milk that will not get any fresher as your boy gets older- this is control-freak-$#!t

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Husband is a selfish frightened control freak *******.If your EX wants the so see his son by all means he should.

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You are in a sticky situation. <br />
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I think that you should discuss it with him. If he doesn't want to accept that it's not his child, then you ought to tell him he has to except it. <br />
it happened and there is no way of taking it back. <br />
He can't let this baby/child grow up not knowing his real father b/c of his own selfish reasons.<br />
Plus, a real father doesn't mean just baby making or just seeing him. it's who thrives with him, feeds him, takes him to games, plays basketball outside, has him help fixing the car, watching practice, be there when he gets the diploma. <br />
You never know when this child grows up, he might not even want to see the dad, but maybe he will want to just see the Father. Try to have him understand. <br />
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If he doesn't listen and still won't change his mind and you are close to him or he is reachable. Tell him the situation. Ask him what to do. <br />
And if unnecessary have him file papers to at least get part custody so your husband won't think it's your decision. And he can't possibly divorce you if you had no choice. <br />
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Hope this helped.

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We are probably missing a whole bunch of background. But, it basically has more to do with how your son feels about this. Your husband is probably just throwing a hissy fit right now. I would do right by my son before I did what my husband THOUGHT was right.

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You need to do what's best for your child and you know that is having a healthy relationship with his bio dad . Why does your husband not want what's best for your bot either , that would worry me .

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Well I think you should sit him down and tell him that this is for your child. He/She does deserve to see his/her biological father and then later on in life allow your child to make their own choices on if they still wish to get to know their biological father or not. My mom told me I had a biological father when I was 7 and gave me the choice to meet him or not. I decided yes and tried to get to know him but over time I decided to stop meeting him because I didn't like the person that he was.

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