My husband is really verbally abusive towards me,he says it's because I will replace him.What kind of logic is that?
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6 Answers to "My husband is really verbally abusive towards me,he says it's because I will replace him.What kind of logic is that?"
Posted by effy2012 Mar 9th, 2012 at 8:08AM
He thinks that the decision has already been made and is starting the grieving process already . . . he is in the anger stage. Communicate with him . . . get him to talk about why he thinks that he is about to be replaced and either reassure him or try to fix what is broken. Good luck.
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Reply by OsageAphrodite Mar 9th, 2012 at 8:14AM
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Reply by Vessa Mar 9th, 2012 at 9:57AM
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Posted by solowing Mar 9th, 2012 at 8:59AM
It isn't logic; it's dysfunctional thinking. He feels replaceable so he lashes out at you, never mind that said behavior will do nothing but push you away. It's no fun, that's for sure.
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Reply by OsageAphrodite Mar 9th, 2012 at 9:09AM
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Posted by autumntimes Mar 9th, 2012 at 8:37AM
What kind of logic is it? It is either very illogical or very true.
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Posted by Alive2011 Mar 9th, 2012 at 8:20AM
Tell him he is going the right way bout it if he does want you to leave, what a bully!
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Reply by OsageAphrodite Mar 9th, 2012 at 9:11AM
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Posted by Vessa Mar 9th, 2012 at 8:15AM
People who are verbally abusive generally have their own twisted version of "logic". I have experienced someone like that, and it can make you a bit crazy just trying to understand it. Such people never seem to be happy, even if you bend over backwards to please them, they'll just complain that you're bending over wrong.
It is weird...in my last relationship, I had a sense that he was trying to drive me away while simultaneously pulling me toward him. It was bizarre. Talk about your mixed signals. It was like he was always drawing a line in the sand, then getting ticked when I didn't try to cross it. And he never seemed to understand why I would get ticked when he said something nasty- I was always "unreasonable". Oh well, I digress....:)
There's a REALLY good book that helped me a lot- "Why Does He Do That?" by Lundy Bancroft. I got my copy on Amazon, but you could probably get it through a library as well. There are also some good books by Patricia Evans on verbally abusive relationships.
I hope you the best.
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Reply by Vessa Mar 9th, 2012 at 8:27AM
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Posted by onesickmind Mar 9th, 2012 at 8:12AM
I know I've taken that route. Acting like an *** just so a girl would end it so i wouldn't have to do it. Never went as far as being abusive though but that was back in high school. Sounds like dude is way insecure though.
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