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He makes fun of my weight during intimate times. He yells at me in front of people we know and humiliates me and tells me no one wants me because I'm disgusting. He's never hit me but he makes me hate me. Since I've been married I've gained 150 pounds. I'm afraid to leave because I'm almost 35 and have never been with another man. I've never had anyone love me. I hate my life and often want to die. He doesn't help me with money and I pay his bills making mine suffer. I'm afraid to leave because I know I won't get anyone else because not too many like used Black women so I've been told. I'm also afraid because I gave him my virginity. I was 23 when we met. It was arranged and we met on our wedding night. I don't want to be judged harshly and I believe strongly in my vows. I don't know what to do. I'm trying to lose weight but it's so hard when all I think of is death. I have no other hope in life but to die but I can't kill myself because I fear hellfire. Help me please?
Foreverlow Foreverlow 31-35 9 Answers May 29, 2011

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You CAN do better. What's that about used black women? Never heard that one before. You know, a lot of people look below the surface for what's important in a person.

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You need to get out of there.

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divorce that bastard hes doin that to u cuz he knows you have no self confidence and he thinks he can controll u cuz ur fat and lonely. ths is wat u do: divorce his ugly *** ,lose weight, get a boyfrend and show him u can do bad all by ur self. u need more self confidence or he will controll u for them rest of ur life. DO SUMTHIN ABOUT HIM. he married u becuz he knew he could contoll u.u r a good woman and u are strong willed so dont waste the rest of ur life with him and also dont kill ur self. ur a beautiful thick woman who just confused. there is somone out there who will love u and treat u just the way u r so go find him and leave that bim of a husband BEHIND!!!!!!!! good luck and keep me posted. KISSES

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Thank you. It's hard to find people that understand.

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come to join me

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Run, Run,Run, I had a husband like that..Said I was fat, went out on me with (skinny women)..I prayed and told God exactly what I wanted in a man, and 12 years ago he came into my life via internet...Also, you wouldnt believe the men out there that like (fluffy) women..Dear girlfriend..NOOOO man is worth killing yourself over..Besides, after death you will wish you were back on earth to do things over..Even living in the desert surrounded by cactus and sand is better than living with him..He is drowning, swim for the shore girl, let him drown..swim for the shore..Do things that you like, eat something you like, take a walk, talk to nature pet an animal..He doesnt make you happy, there are so many things in this world that will..Swim, Swim, For the shore...

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Do you have any friends? If so, run to them and do not go back. Then start seeing a counsellor to get over all the poison he's been giving you. Stop paying his bills today. You don't have a husband except in legal matters as what he is doing is sick and that is not what his or your vows promised. I relize this is all very easy for me to type in the comfort of my own home, but you are going to need to start using your obvious strength to move on. I say you're strong as it takes strength to live with what you already have. If you need a friend, add me. Hugs and prayers, smallG

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Thank you for your kind words

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