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Thrivingpoet92 Thrivingpoet92 18-21, F 9 Answers Feb 15, 2012

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maybe she is stressed and needs a break, have you tried to help take care of the kids. that will probably help or if not then tell her how it makes you feel when she does that

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maybe shes got so much to worry about with your siblings that she doesnt have room for you. she could see that you were able to take care of youirself much better than the others and she doesnt recognize that you still need her. it sounds like she depends on you for quite a bit and if youre not going to leave home without her blessing then i doubt you will be going anywhere.<br />
(whats a controller?)

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In studies on a child's perception of favoritism by their parents, nearly all children say they were loved the least, even though researches found little difference in the parents actions, words, or observed level of emotional attachment. In my case it was true that mom did love me the least, but in most cases, it is perception; not fact.<br />
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Stop trying to please her. Stop worrying about who mommy loves more. Just be yourself and enjoy life. You are at the age where you should be moving out into the world and discovering yourself, not clinging to mom's apron.

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That makes perfect sense. I've been discovering myself, making plans to leave, all the stuff 19 year olds are supposed to do. I'm just lacking encouragement from the one person I need it from

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Different issue. As the father of three children who are now in their thirties, I can tell you it is very hard to see your children leave home. You have spent 18-20 years feeding them, caring for them when they are sick, watching over them to keep them safe, and when they grow up and leave. Almost over night, the parent is expected to give up two decades of habit and vigilance, and let their child go. It takes us more time to adjust to the change than it will take you. .... Your mom probably doesn't realize she is being unsupportive. Sit down with your mom and in a kind and loving way let her know that you are growing up, that it is time for you to move on with the next big part of your life, and that you need and want her loving support. I would expect her to come through for you. Good luck.

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It may not have as much to do with you as with your mom. You should just do your best and not worry so much about trying to get her approval. It.s not always possible to please certain people.

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Get in the boat! Time to sail away.I think our problem is we are trying to please a heart that's so small all the space has been given away

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How does she favour the others? <br />
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My mother favours my brother more than me....but only monatary wise. His life is off track and he never seems to have sustainable funds where i am married and two incomes at hand when needed. <br />
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But she treats us as equal emotionally wise....<br />
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So does she favour them more with money and gifts or emotionally?

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She gives them money and buys them food at the store, but if I ask for anything she'll sigh and remind me how much money she doesn't have. In one day she gave my brother 40 dollars, bought my sister mcdonalds, and my step dad dinner, but forgot to bring me two dollar burgers that I asked for with no legitimate reason why. Then she asked me to do her laundry but gets mad if I shower at the wrong time of morning. I just don't understand

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Oh my, maybe she does not realize how she is making you feel. I have a step sister, a brother, a half sister and a half brother...very weird family dynamic.
How does your step father treat you? I know my step mother favors my half siblings because they are her children and i am not, but my father has always treated me as an equal.
You should sit down and talk with your mother about how she is making you feel. If you get nervous write it all down and that way when you are speaking with her you have the letter or note to fall back on and keep your courage up.
Every child has a right to be heard!

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aww im sorry hun, can't answer that question. what have you done to try to please her?

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I've worked since I was 15, finished all 12 years of school consecutively, enrolled into college, and am about to graduate in June. I took care of my grandma while she was dying, still take care of my eldest relatives who can't on their own, cooked, cleaned, and took care of my nephew for 9 months until my clinicals, I've done everything I could imagine. She can't even remember to bring me dinner. She sees cuts on my arms and legs and tells me to wear long sleeve shirts and long shorts. She gives my siblings money for food and drug habits and I will literally starve cause she makes me feel bad for asking for money for food at work or school

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if she's not proud of who you are and what you have become, then be proud about it yourself. like someone mentioned above, maybe it is time for you get independent and work for your own good. i know a mothers love is important, but if she's not willing to give it, ou can't make her. please yourself adnn be proud, maybe in the way you can find a lovely lady who can appreciate you instead

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Does she have more in common with them? That kind of thing does happen.

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My eldest sister is a drug addict, my eldest brother is an alcoholic, and my little brother does nothing but play video games. My mom has never smoked or picked up a controller, but drank very lightly and only socially. I'm the first in my immediate family to go to college, graduate, and make something of myself. I am a better person and have higher goals than any of my family. I thought she'd be proud, but it doesn't seem so

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