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AquarianMime AquarianMime 56-60, M 17 Answers Jan 25, 2013 in Dating & Relationships

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I've dated a man who didn't have money.

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That's not my question. I understand that's possible. In general, it is common advice from parents, "You must find someone who is successful--meaning he has money." But at the same time, people criticize a woman by saying, she's going after his money. It's just a weird contradiction--at least so it seems to me at this moment.

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I've never been told to refuse a date from someone who doesn't have money.

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You have cool parents then! Surely you've heard these comments somewhere though?

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I've heard it from some women. "I don't want to date someone broke". But I always assumed it was because they wanted to go places and go out. I came from a poor family, I understand how to do things and go places without having money.

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I say sit down and make a list of things you like and want in life. Then put yourself out there to meet people that won't screw up your list. If you want to travel the world and have the finest things in life I wouldn't go looking for dates at the unemployment line. Perhaps the Country Club? If you want to settle down and live on love and have children I sure wouldn't be looking in the bars.. maybe church? If you just want to have some fun and date without looking towards a future commitment.. then who cares what's in their pocket as long as they can afford to have fun with ya :) <br />
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Disclaimer: Yes you can find someone to settle down with in a bar. Yes you can find a poor person in a country club. It was just examples.. please don't go crazy on me!<br />
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Different people are everywhere and you can't tell what's in their pocket!

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Good answer. Thanks. I find this whole subject interesting and enlightening!

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No, it's not a contradiction. It is a balance! On the one hand, money should NOT be your primary motivation for wanting to spend time with someone. But on the other hand, do you REALLY want to get involved with that guy who has no job, still lives with his parents, and plays video games all day? THAT would not bode well for a future together! I think it's better to put it in terms of motivation, not money. Don't get involved with someone who has no motivation. With motivation, there will be money... maybe not a LOT of money, but enough. But without motivation, the outlook is bleak.

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Good answer. Thanks for helping me sort this out.

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Chicks always go for the confident, successful guy.

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Not always. But commonly.

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I think what they mean is that you can date someone with money, but you have to act like you don't like it. Cause that'll make you look like a *****.

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Not really. It is more like be selective in who you date. If you are attracted to someone who doesn't have money you are more likely to end up stressed out because you will always be wondering what that person will demand of you. It is also bad if you are attracted to someone's money but not themselves. So date someone you find attractive and who has equal if not more money than you.

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I don't want to date someone with money and I don't want to date someone without money. I want a man that is finacially stable. But at the same time, I have to be financiallt stable as well.

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I never say dont date for money :)

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Not really. Just date from your heart. Not your checkbook.

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Yes it is. The people who say they don't date for money really are to some extent. Money is necessary...life is simpler and more comfortable when there's more of it. It's depressing to think about, so I think people try not to, and pretty it up by saying they don't date for money.

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because women not need only money they need more....there are just moron........if you give lot of love and less money they will complain........if you give lot of money and less time than also they complain..if give lot of time as well as money than also they complain as he never give me my space or privacy........they want more more more.......as they are moron.........................<br />
see every person has its limitations...........if he is plus on some front he definitely minus on some front so women have to manage it. but instead managing they complain........there search is just endless.......

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Maybe women just don't like YOU.

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they like me as i am a very open person. whatever i am saying it has a very solid base.....do not ignore it.... see womens basic tendency...... i will msg you and we will chat on it. i give examples and lot of theory...so you can have an insight................do not look at me by different way......i like womens the most............i learned lot of from them.................but fact is something different....... i do not want to hurt the fertility i only putting my perspective which is developed because of women`s..........

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were do you go to find them?

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I think what thay are saying is keep money out of relationships......and money tends to get in the way when its too few or to much

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