Previously posted but still confused?

I don't know about drugs either. But it's perfectly normal that his therapist can't talk to you, it's patient confidentiality stuff. I would be more concerned if his counselor was willing to share information with you about your husband, since that would be completely unprofessional and it might even be against the law, I'm not sure. However, you might consider going to see a therapist yourself, they might be able to explain more about the symptoms of drug use recovering, etc. It would also be a support for you in trying to deal with all of this.

You seem to be getting a lot of opinions in real life about your husband, but as you've probably already found, that can be even more confusing when no one really knows. If he keeps showing up as clean in the tests, then it may be aftermath and recovery and not a sign that he's still using. Especially if he was using for a long time, drugs can mess your body up bad, and it takes awhile for things to recover. Even smoking can effect you years after you quit, and coke is harder on you than nicotine is.

Meanwhile, you're doing the right thing, being supportive and tying to get informed. I'd talk to a counselor, even if it's just to get basic information about what to expect as normal in recovering after quitting coke. and what the signs of a relapse are. That way you know what to keep an eye out for and what to expect. Keep it general (especially if it's the same one your husband goes to), you want basic information, so you can apply it to your situation, you're not asking him/her to tell you ABOUT your husband specifically, so it shouldn't violate anything.

Is there a support group for friends/family or people quitting drugs? If so, that might also be of help for you, or they might have better information to some of your questions. Or maybe you could talk to some of the poeple in charge of NA, if they're willing to give you information about what's normal, and symptoms of a relapse, etc.

The job layoff is not going to be helping things with your husband, emotionally. Just keep doing what you're doing, being supportive, encouraging him to stick with the support groups, etc. And getting real information and not just opinions, even though it may be hard to get the answers to your questions, someone out there has got to know the answer. And good luck!

Gosh!! What to say. I suppose if his urine is clean (this if he is using his and no one else's) then his mood swings are something else?! Bi-polar? Depression? It could be a combo of many things. But talking about it to him and making sure that he is clean and sober is really all you have to do besides considering couples counseling for you both? Good luck in whatever happens

kudos to you for living with it. !!!!!!!!!

It is traumatic to withdraw from any mind altering drug, insist he goes to some support group. NA AA anywhere these groups meet to get input and advise...