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Recently, i've been wanting to have a bf soo badly.. is it okay to feel this way?

i never dated.. but never really needed a boyfriend. i mean, yeah, i kinda envied my girlfriends who have their real cute and caring bfs but i never wanted to have one this much. but now it's seemsthat i need one, and there doesn't seem to be the special one i've been looking for, whom i'd like to be my first one.. it's really confusing, y'know. you may think: "hey, girl, you can't get it both ways.. either you wait and stop complainig or get the one that's available" is it so? well i can wait.. i think.. i just wondered if it's okay to feel this way? is it healthy to think about how having a bf would have felt for the last couple of days? or am i going insane??
Posted 3 months ago
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It's ok to feel the want.

Nomdeplume put it harshly and OldGroupies put it a bit better. You can't want it so badly that you are willing to go to any degree to get it...and your writing seems a bit on the desperation side. Perhaps we're wrong. But if we're right, you need to resolve your own insecurities. Yes, insecurities. You are insecure that you don't have a boyfriend. Is it ok to WANT ONE? SURE IT IS! Is it ok to let it fill your every moment...to be finding out "who's available" and trying to hook up with them? NO, it's not. As stated by others, a boyfriend is not someone who happened to be available at the time when you needed one. He's someone whose talk makes you laugh, whose presence makes you giddy....or certainly happy, who you want to have around more than anyone else you know, etc. He's someone you met WITHOUT GOING INTO THE DEAL, THINKING THAT YOU ARE HITTING ON HIM BECAUSE HE'S AVAILABLE.

Now if HE'S in the market and say you both meet at a dating event...that's different. Now you are both indicating that you are looking...and hopefully if they are worth their salt, the dating place is providing some kind of personality matching service for both of you.

If you let your burning desire cloud your judgment, you may very well end up burning yourself in the process because you will "settle" for less than you deserve. You will be happy to have a boyfriend...and if he ends up being a jerk...or even slightly "not that polite or considerate or wishy washy," you will put up with his BS...and no one wants to see anyone put up with some jerk's BS just because they don't want to be alone.

Be smart...clear your head...make your own life clear...you are very young. I've known gals who did not have a BF before they went to college and were near graduation. You are not even close yet. BE patient! When you meet him, you will know...and so will he.
Posted 3 months ago

Other 11 Answers to Recently, i've been wanting to have a bf soo badly.. is it okay to feel this way?


Posted Aug 20th, 2009 at 10:44AM
Yes, it's called being lonely.
Rated: +3Vote for this!  
Posted Aug 20th, 2009 at 10:26AM
I had my first bf when I was 18 because I was curious and because I was jealous to my friends but when I felt the pain I wished I never had one, but at the end im thankful cause it made me stronger. So its not bad if you want to have a bf just be prepared. Every ACTION has a REACTION.
Rated: +2Vote for this!  
Posted Aug 20th, 2009 at 10:45AM
No, as you reek of desperation when you really want someone in your life and that is a major turn off and also you will settle for anything and sacrifice yourself too much. To be attractive you must be yourself completely.
Rated: +2Vote for this!  
Posted Aug 20th, 2009 at 10:13AM
Hi letianu
dont get the one that's available - that is not a boyfriend! You gotta get the one you want or it does not work. Put more effort into your search. Do research!
:)
Rated: +1Vote for this!  
Posted Aug 20th, 2009 at 10:18AM
i had craving for a swee an sar wiv fli li but i never thourght about having bf soo although i do like sheken and swee cor soo.
Rated: +1Vote for this!  
Posted Aug 20th, 2009 at 10:33AM
Honey, it's completely normal for girls of your age to want a boyfriend. And, yes, most "relationships" formed in your teenage years will simply be a matter of trying to find a person to fill your loneliness. They don't tend to become life-long commitments, just so you know. :)

However, that doesn't mean that you shouldn't take relationships seriously, or that you should just jump into something with the first guy who comes along. It's normal to WANT to have a boyfriend (any boyfriend), but it's never a good idea to pursue someone with anything other than honest intentions. I know that it's hard, but try to maintain some self control, and wait for a guy to come along who you think you can really "click" with. You'll be much better off in the long run.
Rated: +1Vote for this!  
Posted Aug 20th, 2009 at 12:09PM
Keep waiting :)
If you want it to be someone who you really click with, keep waiting. If you're in it for experience, than maybe try the available and see how things turn out. Don't ever do anything you are not comfortable with though. Be true to yourself and with them.
Rated: +1Vote for this!  
Posted Aug 20th, 2009 at 12:12PM
its totally ok to feel that way. join the rest of girl kind!
you dont 'need' him but you 'want' him. thats completely normal.
speaking personally, its much better to wait till that special person comes along. -but theres nothing wrong with experiementing early, providing its all done at your own pace.
Rated: +1Vote for this!  
Posted Aug 20th, 2009 at 12:16PM
perfectly normal I feel the same way about a girl friend but I refuse to settle for some thuged out hood rat druggy or pathetic girly girl who wants my "protection" (puke) I'll wait till I find a decent woman, their around. Don't let it get to you and don't give you love to some one who is a piece of **** they dont' deserve it.
Rated: +1Vote for this!  
Posted Aug 20th, 2009 at 2:22PM
I don't think you're going about it the right way, but yes it is ok to feel that way. Being lonely isn't anything to be ashamed of whatsoever. But, if you go into this only looking for " a boyfriend," you may not be happy with the results. It isn't right to just want a boyfriend. You should find someone you really like, who makes you feel good about yourself, and who truly cares about you. Someone you could have a long relationship with, and who you can talk to and trust with anything. If you just start looking for a boyfriend, and he's only looking for a girlfriend, you'll have a problem. You need to look for someone special. Hope this helps :)
Rated: +1Vote for this!  
Posted Aug 20th, 2009 at 6:57PM
listen just do what u want to with out caring what others thinklove is something that comes alone the right person will come along and its normal to feel that way after all we are humans and have needs so just be your self what ever that may be the point is to be happy.
Rated: +1Vote for this!  
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