How can he be so cold hearted ... sounds amoral and sadistic ...I'd leave

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sounds like something is badly wrong with your husband. Thats how a nickle and dime thug thinks.

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Never betray your child over a man. Husbands come and go, but your son is your son forever. Your husband may've already damaged your son's self-esteem with his antiquated attitudes about what constitutes "masculinity". If he can't be made to understand that your son deserves to be loved and accepted, for who he IS, and not made to fit in some stereotypical box, you owe it to your son to remove such a destructive influence from his life.

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your son may change and become more of what you husband likes in a person. but your husband is damaging him by acting like a complete moronic ******* shithead. the jerk faced dummy does not love your son! if he did he would accept him no matter what. i say tell him to f*** off and get the hell out. your son will be better off.

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I was in a similar situation. My stepfather HATED me for no apparent reason except that I used to "get on his nerves" for some reason. My mom left him.<br />
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Leave your husband. Your husband is most likely going to do nothing but damage your son and probably do damage to the relationship between you and your son. <br />
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Good luck!

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Don't leave him because of that opinion, leave him because he's the kind of person who has opinions like that. Your son deserves better.

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Im in the same position as you trying to seek advise or help. My sons 8 and my bf hates him and their rude az to each other everyday it hurts me so much coz i feel i have to leave my bf which i don't want to do but feel i need to do it for my son as hes unhappy az can be and he tells me my bf pokes his tongue at him behind my back and other smartass things that wind him up really bad as my son had post traumatic stress and adhd and gets angry very easily and just explodes in anger .my bf does it to get him in trouble is what my son thinks mayby hes right i dont know coz my bf never dose it in front of me.but he tells me my sons a smart *** and that hes so rude and an egg of ******* always calling him names.i love my son and would choose him over my bf naturally but iv never had a calm relationship like this b4 only abusive violent ones so im very scared to let this one go coz i know id never find another this laidback.and i have very bad luck in picking guys my sons p.t.s.d is because of my last violent relationship it affected him very badly,which i feel awful over and blame myself or his bad behaviour as i brang that horrible relationship around him.

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well i don't mean to sound mean but seems to me that youve contributed to all this happening to you guys by accepting these things.. believe in your son, your bf is an asssss hole!!! no child deserves to be mistreated even the really spoiled bad behaved children.. in the end if they're bad it isnt bad children its bad parenting!! anyways pls leave your bf, maybe you just need to let some time go by before getting emotionally involved with someone, your son is you total responsibility his well being and happiness relies on you... think about it.
good luck!

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kind of hard to resolve all i can say is my step son Chris is gay i ingnored this and let him think i didn't know . even now he is in his 30's and i still pretend i don't know and as it is we get along just fine , my wife and i talked about it between ourself's and figgerd if he want's us to know then he will tell us . The best thing is to teach honesty and to try his best at all times . trying to get him to be what he can't or won't be is just plane wrong

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This is a very stressful way to live and I do feel for you.<br />
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Your child sounds like a perfectly normal young man who will most likely grow into a very nice adult. <br />
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Your husband is way out of line but then, can you really change his narrow view of others?<br />
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You need counseling for yourself first, and if he would eventually join that would be great but I wouldn't make any guarantees on that. He does not seem like a man open to change. Get yourself some support and see how things go. Is there a way meanwhile you could keep your son and husband apart? Good luck!

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Aha, families can be a problem all right!<br />
This is a thorny issue and probably won't ever go away. Your son will grow up and make his own way in the world, helped by your unconditional love and kindness. He doesn't have to live his life the way his stepdad thinks he should. If I was that son, I'd probably have stopped coming round to yours by now. Maybe the answer is to visit him when he gets his own place and leave your husband out of it. Your hubby sounds like the sort of man who is intolerant of the way others choose to be; its a shame but from what you have said its unlikely to change. <br />
How old is your son now?<br />
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PS I was a stepson, but had a dream stepdad. A shame your son hasn't got one too, but there it is.

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I have the same problem. I dont know what to do.

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