If "the way you are," includes letting people who harm you keep harming you?
You might want to adopt a more defensive posture.
Every person has a lesson for you. Maybe the lesson you need to learn here is how to respect yourself, respect your own boundaries...
Ask yourself (not me) this: What would be too much for you to forgive?
What could they do that would mean that the relationship was ended permanently for you?
For instance, if some "friend" steals from me? They have ended the friendship. Not that I'm choosing to end it, but that their behavior means we are no longer friends, and that's just how it is.
That's a boundary.
To quote an author: "I don't know what your boundaries are, but I know you have them."
Start doing for yourself and not caring about what others think.
learn to be chill, lots of **** and ************ eases the pain
Don't know what you've been through yet sounds like perhaps understanding how to establish boundaries with others and why it's important to do so will help you to insure you're treated in a manner you find acceptable. Instead of limiting yourself to two options which seem intolerable, get outside the box and be creative in finding a way to make your life tolerable. We all have the right to pursue our own definition of happiness......Merry Christmas.
Rock out with your mother ******* **** out.