Start/ and stop behavior?

stop argueing with my boyfriend & start loving each other.

I want to start progressing in life and I want to stop letting people take advantage of me.

As it seems very likely that both of these desires stem from guilt, the start/stop/start cycle will likely continue. This is due to Guilt relying on its constant co-hort, Resentment. This is especially true if you have tried to do these things before without any lasting success or consistency.

The way out of the start/stop/start cycle is to get rid of the sense of Responsibility. The illusion that you have "responsibility" is what makes one feel indebted - and just inspires more resentment.

Creditors won't stop bothering you. They make enough money.
But you owe them. And not paying them is stealiing.

Children won't stop bothering you. Why can't they just Obey?
But you are the adult. They don't mean you any harm.

The above examples are a split in your psyche, and cause a real psychological state that is clinically called, "neurosis". You feel sorry for yourself because of resentment. And then you feel guilty. The cure isn't that far away, however, and merely requires a readjustment of perspective:

Creditors are merely companies that play a game. You have no "responsibility" to them. There is no "right" way to behave. Merely pay if you feel like it, or take the consequences if you don't. Bankruptcy is a wonderfully liberating alternative and incurs no shame. If you don't like that, then continue playing a game that you already know the rules of but will never "win".

Children are merely human beings who are closer to their instincts and thus more alive than adults. Most of what you may not like about them are their best traits. Their screaming, lying, chaos and disobedience are all signs of life. Instead of resenting them (and then feeling guilty), try to learn from them. They don't waste time worrying about creditors or feeling sorry for themselves. They merely live. And there is nothing wrong with yelling at them. Though you mind find it more liberating to yell *with* them.

There is no right/wrong behavior. There are merely possibilities, and the less guilty you feel, the more possibilities will open up. Become you who are...and be free.

START being in own's full-composure & STOP being depressed/supressed

start living.
stop waiting.

As for starting something, we are in agreeance. Stoppoing...? I'd like to stop being a jerk magnet, but I'm not sure how!