i was in a taxi one day and mark hoppus got in and started groping me

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Why the hell don't I know the gropper mark hoppus? Have I been in my cave too long and the light of day has disolusiomed me? Who is this guy and will I hope to be gropped as well?

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he's thoroughly decent chap sometimes, but other times he worships satan

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I was riding a cab in the middle of nowhere at 10 p.m. once. It was this single lane country road, and we were the only ppl there. The cab driver excused himself and pulled over in the middle of the woods to pee. That was quite unexpected and crazy.

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When u gotta go, u gotta go. Hope he didn't keep the meter running cuz I would have short changed him for that. Unless of corse I enjoyed it and then I would double his tip.

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No, the meter was not running. But that was the least of my concerns at the time!

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I was a passenger when a guy shot and killed a man in the back of the bus here in San Antonio not too long ago. I was too far away to react to it...

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