Throw them a candy bar and watch them tear each other apart for it.

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tell them dunkin donuts is having a sale

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Give them a boxful of donuts.

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throw a twinkie into wet cement

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Oh goodness, lol.

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Play a tuba solo..theyll immediately go into a march

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I can run faster than fat kids

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Lecture them on more healthy options for eating and robbing me.

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Tell them you worship Satan and that you can put a curse on them that will make their you know want dry rot and fall off.

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Join them and rob people of junk food

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