Oh no oh no I spilled the blood I was supposed to use to make the blood pudding for the royal baby banquet, the queen will have my head on a platter for this, and chef Ramsey will be screaming all manner of dreadful words!!

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She wasn't as old as I thought..

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I cut myself working on a barbed wire fence.

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Paper cut from ATM withdrawing money.......

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Old Mr Brown went **** up in the shower again and I got his blood all over me helping him up.

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umm they believed muhammad...

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I cut myself shaving??????

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