This is a horrible situation to be in and I understand because I too tried to be the lone pillar of support in my family. It was a horrible feeling to be in a position of working for everybody else and sacrificing my time, my happiness, my future, and not feeling like there was any kind of alternative; also it was thankless. There is a difference between helping someone and doing everything for someone; help shouldn't be all consuming, and it should be a temporary thing. Yet as I see it the big problem is these people are your family, and it sounds like you don't want to abandon them. Consider that you deserve to have a life in which you can spend your free time as you wish, and that you deserve to be loved, and that your money belongs to you and not the collective, because it is all true. Also consider you are talking about adults here who have and can make their own choices. Don't be afraid to look after yourself and your needs first before trying to help someone else. Abuse is never acceptable, so if nothing else you need to figure out how to stay away from it. Setting boundaries of what you are willing and not willing to do for your family is a healthy thing to do. Choosing to do the things that you want to do is also healthy. Keep in mind that if you go your own way and are convinced your family can not provide for themselves there is such a thing as social services and they can get help there.

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