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she pushes me around and fights ...and today she hit and bit me ...locking me inside the bathroom for an hour
goodseemore goodseemore 41-45, F 20 Answers Nov 9, 2011

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Look for a reason , find out why . I can't understand parents , teachers etc who see a troubled kid and alarm bells don't ring out .<br />
13 year olds don't act out with out being in a lot of pain ( those without disorders ). Find out why she's crying out for help . A counselor perhaps . <br />
Help her .

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I agree with you. I think the parent and the child might benefit from counseling. I've taken parenting classes myself and learned to deal with my daughter...so she's doing well

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I work as a youth worker but also have a daughter the same age , if she gets angry with me we talk about it then and there . Most of the time she acts out because she is hurting from something , be it school or her dealing with her autistic brother . A child needs to be heard and needs to know their parents get it . It amazing what the words " I understand you're feeling ......" can do to diffuse a situation . Parents get caught up with how they feel and completely miss what the child is trying to say through anger / rage . As a parent your feeling come second to your child's .

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Did you hit and bite your mother too, because if your 13 I think your big enough to ask for help,besides Im sure her mother has tried ,I feel for the mother hitting biting thats crossing the line no mother deserves that Help her Im sure thats the first she ever considered helping her,c mon boo hoo, im sorry

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This is why the whole world has gone to hell, children by definition need guidence,to know what is exceptable behavoir, she refusing to go to school biting and hitting her mother and you think by saying i understand how your feeling violence is somthing that should not be tolerated what will she be doing at 16,i understand why you stold our car and got drunk and God know what else if you want you can sock me in the face there there its about you im happy to come second ??? really no stop your joking right

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Ground her. Take away all privileges. Disconnect Internet, phones, and take away TV so she's bored to death. Talk to her and see what her reason is for not wanting to go.

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My dad did that to me he took out all of the TVs and phones and yes I was bored out of my mind but I still dropped out of school at 13, why because I was failing my math and I had bullies. But I did go back to school when I met my husband and did my highschool, it was much better the second time around I was friends with everybody and I really valued educating myself.

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I have gone through this situation my self with my youngest son. I was struggling to cope after the breakdown of my relationship with my boys father and like you my son was resisting me, refusing to go to school and hitting out. I resolved the problem by calling the school and enlisting the help of the headteacher. He spoke to him in private and my son confided in him about how he felt with losing his father, slowly things got better. Best of luck to you.

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talk to her, she could be being bullied and thats why she wont go

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shes still a mamas girl not too big still<br />
talk to her<br />
i think its a matter of love

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You dont know whats best for you at 13,thats why we have parents, ive seen people ask three yr old well why dont you want to do this or that like the three yr. old knows whats best and so the mother is making him what he wants matters no it doesnt you know what best. now hes going come up with why he does nt want to do everything ,mommy know whats best for you sweetheart when you grow up and have your own children you will always know whats best because youll love them as much as i love you big hug big kiss now do whstever i told you to do

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When they know so much ... in their little lives, you let them believe that they are big enough to look after themself and since she is tooo big for school, then send her packing ... she will be back with a new fr<x>ame of mind. Dropouts ... remain dropouts, and if school is a no go... then its time she moved and fended for herself.....

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jesus, find out WHY, there has to be a reson, every try actually talking to her? and dont be so dramadic, if your kid is truely acting like an animal, if i were you i would do more than ask a question on ep.

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what do you mean by big? if i were you i would not pay no attention to her because there is going to be a time that she might need help or want to talk to someone. also it depends if you love her and if you cant handle her situation as a parent then i guess my advice to you is having somone coming to t he home and talk to her and ask her what is her problem, also if it delsa something in the family that she acts like that. another thing is why would she act like that and has she been like that before. so basicaly is jsut to ignore and not do anything back to her cause it will makes things worst but if your the type of parent that cant dealw ith children under that situation then you can get help cause some parents do that and also some parents send off their kids somewhere else cause they don't want to deal with it physically.

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Document the episodes of abuse with the who, where, what ,when and why, complete with pictures of any wounds she gives you. Consider calling the police with assault and battery charges then let her deal with the consequences of her behavior. You may not be the only one she physically attacks. It will be hard to watch your baby get into trouble with the law but sometimes loving our children means making hard choices and hanging tough in order to do the best for them. You may also want to get her a psych evaluation to see if she has a personality disorder. At 13 there's still time to save her from herself.<br />
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Learn how to pick locks and take doors off the hinges when locked in a room.Who is physically larger you or her? Do not let her kick your butt, or you will have a bigger monster on your hands. You may have to take some self defense classes and learn how to take her down. I agree with the others about finding out why she don't want to go to school.Talk to her teachers and counselors they may be of help.

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Prehaps a different school can give her a fresh start

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No 1 what is her reason? I would rule out bullying or any other problem like that first.

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shes acting out for a reason, a reason coemergent and dependent upon your relationship..figure it out

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