My daughter is now 23 going on 24. If I had a dollar for every time she's either said she never wants to see me again, talk to me again, etc etc. I'd be a rich woman. Yet in a moment I'll need to log off here so I can phone her back as I wasn't able to answer the phone earlier due to a diaper emergency with my toddler. Point is, my highly creative, energetic, very emotional daughter tends to say such things just about anytime she is royally upset with me. While I'd prefer we could handle all disagreements in a more mature fashion, I've learned to roll with these punches as I understand she is still trying to sort herself out (time in Iraq was tough on her) and this is currently how she deals with her feelings. I've learned to try to remain as non-reactional as possible, express my love for her (as she's storming out my front door) and wait the 24 hours (give or take) until she makes contact. Sometimes if something comes up in the meantime of which I think she'd be interested I'll send a text message to her. I do this as my way of letting her know the door is still open on my end. Sometimes it breaks the ice, sometimes more time has to pass. I think the fact she feels free to express her frustration in this manner (although I see it as immature) is not such a bad sign, as I think she is able to do so because she knows she is safe with me in that I will still love her, regardless, even while she's really angry at me in the moment.
ive said it to my mom and then a week later was right back in her face this just happens sometimes ... let her know you love her and tell her when she is ready your her mom and you love her..
Let her go but have at least ONE meaningful converstaion without judgement. Explain that you love her and that being a mother does not make you perfect. Ask her to accept your faults, as life is long and she sure as hell will have faults of her own. Let her know your door is open and that regardless of the past - the future is lonely without family and friends. Make sure she know that no matter what...you are there for her, and that you accept her for who she is. Ask that she does the same. She will be back.
most likely she said that just because she's mad, i seriously doubt that she would actually never want to see you again, i'm 18, i'm extremely attached to my family, and honostly i cannot imagine saying that to my parents, but i dont live with my parents anymore, havne't for about 4 or 5 months, so going from seeing them daily to once a week has been hard.
When i was 15, 16, or 17, i would have said that, espeically if my parents made me angry.
Just give her time like everyone else is saying, but if she doesn't live with you, your going to deffinatly want to shoot her a text message saying you love her, and you want to talk about it, she's not going to most likely but she's gonna still need to know you care.
Keep loving her and never stop even if she doesn't love you in return. And do not expect her to love you in return.
let her go. she will come around sooner or later. i dont know the situation but i do have 4 kids.
let her calm done then talk it through with her don't just let it go xx
What I am about to say you may not like, but it might help you better understand your situation.. Both my sister and I have MAJOR problems with our parents. We vent to each other about them every time we talk. I'm not sure what kind of mom/dad you are, but you really shouldn't worry. You said she's 18. That's still teen years. I'm 15 and my sister is 19. Trust me, your daughter has probably said things behind your back you may not want to hear, but it's because shes a teen. SHE LOVES YOU - SHE'S JUST BEING A TEEN. All teens pretty much think that their parents are freaks, who think they know everything. Yes, we know that you have lived it, you have been there, you have done that, but we want to live our own lives, we want to make our own mistakes, we want to learn from our mistakes, and we want our parents to just leave us alone and let us be a teen. We are only a teen once and we want to fully live it. Did you know.. the more you tell your teen 'no' the more she's gonna go out in the world and disobey you?
My advise to you, is to just give her time. Show her you can be a fun and responsible person at the same time. If she wants the car, let her use the car - just have rules. She's gonna hate the rules, but later in life when she's the one who's got her future set and her friends don't.. she's gonna thank you. Let her be a teen. Let her live and make her own mistakes. I know your a worried parent that wants to keep her safe, but even if your with her their is still that same chance thats shes gonna screw up. It's what we do, and when we screw up we want to know that our parents are going to be there for us. So let her be a teen, and when shes screws up, don't jump down her throat - love her, love her with all your heart and cry if needed. Give her time, she'll come around - If you believe in God, pray for her. You pray, God will keep her safe.
Much luck and love,
That reminds me of the Eddie Murphy stand-up special, Delirious. On one part of it, he talks about how a kid will start wishing "hateful sh*t" on his mother after she yells at him. Have you ever seen that, by the way? It's so funny. Anyway, point is, kids will say mean things to you, even about you, when they're angry. People do that all the time. She doesn't mean it and she'll calm down.
But talk to her about it, though. Don't yell - talk about what got her angry. And also just 'cause you're the parent don't make the conversation one sided
things are said when we are upset,frustrated,angry etc....she will calm down eventually...just let her know, nomatter what that she is always welcome and wanted in your home
I'd take into consideration that she's only 18 (a teenager) and most teenagers feel this way at some point. I'd give her some space and assume that things would get better eventually.... I'd also remain in touch while giving her space- send holiday cards, call on her birthday, send cash or gifts for such occasions. Leave messages to ask how she is periodically if she refused to talk to me.
Of course - the reason she didn't want to see me anymore may also change the way I'd react.
Oh boy. Been there. Teen Moms and daughters mix like oil and water. DON'T LET GO! Take many deep breaths, give her space, but never let go. This too will pass.
I'd bet she doesn't mean it. But that doesn't make it hurt any less. Pray. God can work on her rebellious heart and turn it around. Let her know you love her, and are there for her....she'll come around.
I'm 17 and I can't picture even saying that, let alone meaning it. give her time, keep loving her, if you're a belever in God, pray about it. She probably just blurted it out in a moment of anger without truly meaning it in her heart.