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donna19 donna19 51-55 8 Answers Nov 22, 2012 in Struggles

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silence is an answer . . . he doesn't feel the same as you and your apology is not well accepted more than likely.

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Or the person could be thinking about it. Showing how you feel and apologizing can be very unexpected. In an argument... the natural thing is to defend yourself... and then the other person defends themself. But, when you apologize, you just showed humility. You let the other person win even though they might not deserved it. This might be quite unexpected... almost unnatural to them. How can they answer? They could keep going and beat you into the ground... yet, they did not. Why? Why silence. They might have realized that going on could only lead to more pain. If they avoid giving you more pain, they might value the relationship. Or, they might just be stumped and that makes them think. NO response could mean reevaluating the argument and how it effects the relationship. Apologizing can be a very powerful response. It can tell the other person that the argument is not as important than the value of the relationship. You value the person more than winning an argument. IF the person continues arguing in that situation they destroy the very reason why it started. Arguments don't have to happen. You could have laughed in their face and brushed them off. But, you showed heavy emotion... a sign that something is important for you, important enough be emotional. Emotions can equal value. Then, you back down, show humility? The other person might not know it yet, but you probably told them how much you REALLY value the relationship. "I don't want to keep doing this because I really care about the relationship." If the other person keeps at it... all they can do is make it worse for themselves. And, everything that both of you accomplished goes to waste... a whole relationship is completely wasted. The anger might still be there. The disagreement? But, you just showed that person how much you value your time together by actually being humble. Humility might sound like a weakness. But, who is really being strong? Who is actually REALLY winning, now?

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You are a good counsellor. Thanks for the good advice.

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Tread carefully Donna,because I had a kind of similar situation and thought the worse.Turns out in communications since that my words had left their impression,and I think the no response was down to the persons awkwardness with the situation.

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Like they really don't care. My husband is like that, and what makes it bad is that he was taught as a child never to say he is sorry for anything he does or doen't do.

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Just walk away. Let the words settle. Some take more time to process than others.

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Pedro's answer could be right. Some people may be caught off guard and not know what to say just then.

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Stab HIM... Jokes!... I Wouldve just walked away ... wouldn't risk embarrasing more of myself..

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