To give me their time,nothing is so precious as time for someone who is in need and I have been fortunate enough for someone very special to me to give me that TIME.
They just made me feel loved and important and that someone actually cared.
My oldest and best friend growing up called me after my mother passed away. As children, teens and young adults it was hard to tell which child belonged to which family as we shared so much of our time with each other. <br />
I had my mother for 93 years, my father had passed 30 years earlier.<br />
I thought I was old enough and wise enough to have balanced my feelings about my mother's death. I was so determined to portray the Jackie Kennedy " face of strength" for my children and all others.<br />
My beautiful friend said to me, "Now I want you to listen to this".........<br />
She told me things she observed throughout all those growing-up years. Ways my parents had shown there love to me and how I returned it. By the time she summed it all up, I was sobbing uncontrollably. I allowed myself to feel the loss, in its entirety, for the first time. It felt good to get it out. I needed to do that.<br />
It doesn't matter what age you are when you lose your Mother, it still hurts. I will forever be grateful for that good, old fashioned "cry out" she gave me. I think it helped me say good bye in a much more loving way.
Our daughter passed away, and my friends left me alone for six weeks. Per my request, I found that to be very kind, everyone is different and I needed solitude.
A friend made me a scrapbook/journal. The first half of a notebook was made into a scrapbook of the good times that we have had, and pictures from magazines of things that make me smile. The rest of it were pages with just a few pictures, but mostly lines left blank for me to journal on.
Help me realize loss is part of growth, and survival is possible.
When I lost my Dad last year, a truly wonderful friend was there for me day and night to listen to me, gently speak a few thoughtful words, and let me know that he honestly cared. His support really got me through it, and I will be forever grateful to him.
They were pretty much there for me: to listen and to talk. When they listened, they were accepting and non judgmental, and if they wanted to approach a sensitive topic, they found a way to discuss it in a way that I didn't feel I was being attacked. When we talked, I appreciated having an outlet for the emotions I had built up, and for feeling like I had a safe place to say what I needed to without fear of offending or boring the person. And most of all, they weren't afraid to ask me how I was feeling about various aspects of that loss. Also, while I appreciated that most people were appropriately solemn about the loss, I really did appreciate that this one friend managed to still be positive and cheerful, and for finding the aspects of the situation to be positive about, which, believe me, most people would not see first.
Not in this lifetime.
Talked to me and offering a shoulder to cry on.
Just spending time ... that's really all that was needed. No advices; just presence.
Gave me a new place to stay, got me into groups to help me through the tough times and made sure that i was ok and talked to me everyday...
The nicest thing a friend has ever done to ease down my burden/loss...was to make me SMILE and that they appreciate me as me. And I don't need a lot of effort to show off to everybody that I am WORTH it. Because they keep on reminding me that they appreciate the imperfection that I have in me. So, whatever problems I encounter my friend will always be there to make me feel better :')
Losing him. xW
just to reassure me that as long as i have memories, the person is never gone.
The nicest thing anyone has ever done for me to help me get over a loss is... no one has ever done anything nice for me for that purpose that I can remember. And I've never asked/expected them to.
Well, once i lost my chips cos they fell...<br />
Yeah so he gave me a chip
they tried their best and made sure that no matter what happens, they'll be around.