Have you tried pinching her nipples? I'm told that works well.
Sometimes women will excuse what a guy does by reminding themselves he's just a man. Sometimes you need to remind yourself she's just a girl.
I just tell them to be quiet.
Count to ten and then go take a long walk.
Tell the girl why you're irritated with her, hopefully she fixes what's irritating you
Slowly back away and never show her your back. You'll find yourself doing a lot of this with your future girlfriends and wives.