To her: nothing, I would steal her clothes (provided it was at my place), toss them out the window, and make her leave naked
To him: hey guy, how's my d--k taste?
Laugh and furiously plan my well deserved night(s) of FREEDOM!
I would fold my cards and claim my chips in the pot.
I left...I mean I would leave him..
Where are you going to live now a-hole?
I would ask for pictures or video...lol
I think it would turn me on! But I'm kind of... different, let's say.
Oh spoil their fun. Make sure they saw me, felt uncomfortable and no happy ending. Then move on.
"I guess I should have called first"
Been there. I didn't handle it well.
Thanks, so was I.
"Why wasn't I invited?"
Keep my cool, that is important. I would want them to regret it deeply, so I wouldn't get revenge on them because that will make them think "well she is a ***** anyway, glad I did it" I would calmly let them know how hurt I was, give them my sad, hurt puppy dog eyes, let them know that we can no longer be together because how much they hurt me. Then I would move on with my life, and let them see it.
actually, forget that last bit. I wouldnt let them see me move on with my life, I would just dissapear without a trace so they could always wonder what ever happened to me... And just get on with it, find someone who wont cheat on me and who will make me happy.
Cry my eyes out!
Except that i don't know how i'd react.