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When a close friend says something that is hurtful to you, is it wrong to expect them to apologize?

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Asked By: racingfan61 46-50, F  7 months ago

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    Best Answer (Chosen By Asker):

    Mencrytoo - 46-50 years old - male

    Posted by Mencrytoo Oct 11th, 2012 at 9:20PM

    Not at all ! If it was that hurtful to you, they owe you an apology. Let them know it was hurtful and see where it goes from there. Some people are just insensative and don't know that their words can hurt.

    [ Reply ] | Like (1)

  1. racingfan61 - 46-50 years old - female

    Reply by racingfan61 Oct 11th, 2012 at 9:40PM

    I told my "friend" that what he said was hurtful, and he was being insensitive. He really didn't care so that kind of hurt more than the hurtful thing he told me.

    Like (1)

  2. Mencrytoo - 41-45 years old - male

    Reply by Mencrytoo Oct 11th, 2012 at 10:27PM

    Then he owes you an apology. End of story. friends don't knowingly hurt you and leave the subject open. It needs to be resolved by an apology.

    Like (1)

6 Answers to "When a close friend says something that is hurtful to you, is it wrong to expect them to apologize?"

  1. musicbook - 56-60 years old - male

    Posted by musicbook Oct 11th, 2012 at 9:20PM

    Expectations are disappointments in the making.

    If a close friend says something hurtful, I'll tell them it was hurtful and ask them whether they MEANT it to be hurtful.

    It gives them a chance to take it back or explain the misunderstanding.

    But, let's face it... They may have meant every word, in which case it's up to ME to deal with it and reconsider the relationship.

    Like (5)

  2. bijouxbroussard - 46-50 years old - female

    Posted by bijouxbroussard Oct 11th, 2012 at 9:34PM

    It depends on many things. If it's someone very close who's saying something I need to hear, I'll usually try to accept it in the spirit it's meant. I have a friend who occasionally opens mouth and inserts foot (she does that with everyone periodically) and I've said, "that really wasn't appreciated." Sometimes I've gone quiet to keep myself from saying anything harsher, and at that point she usually does apologise.

    Like (1)

  3. monardella - 31-35 years old - female

    Posted by monardella Oct 11th, 2012 at 9:22PM

    It's wrong to expect them to know what they said that hurt you. People all communicate so differently that you may have to explain it to them, unless they were outrageously rude. It's one of the things I've found most difficult in friendships with women, we're all so incredibly sensitive that we have a hard time talking out hurt feelings and expectations with each other. I've had women just walk away rather than have an awkward conversation.

    Like (1)

  4. DisorderlyCyn - 41-45 years old - female

    Posted by DisorderlyCyn Oct 11th, 2012 at 9:19PM

    Depends on their nature. If it's someone I know has a hard time apologizing but I can tell they're sorry, I'll let it slide. I don't stay friends with the kind who make it a habit though.

    Like (1)

  5. jatpack3 - 36-40 years old - male

    Posted by jatpack3 Oct 11th, 2012 at 9:18PM

    Sometimes the truth hurts

    Like (1)

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