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I met him at a party. We chatted for about an hour, he seemed really nice, though maybe a bit quiet and not so handsome, just an average guy. We exchanged phone numbers and a week later there was a BBQ at mine to which I invited him - he was the last guest leaving...which made me a bit tired of him actually. Afterwards, as he found out that I like outdoor sports, he invited me to go paddling. From the way he acts and messages he writes me, it seems he is head over hills in love. The thing is: I don't know if I like him at all, at least romantically! I sorta like him, sorta not. I mean I saw him only twice, that impression could maybe change. I just don't want to break his heart and hurt him, if I'm not going to develop any feelings for him. Do you go on a date in such a situation? If so, what do you do, not to lead him on, if you're not sure. Do you only say that you're not sure when he reveals his feelings 'officially'?
AineFromAstolat AineFromAstolat 22-25, F 8 Answers Jun 8, 2011

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If you were a bit tired of him at the BBQ, I wouldn't bother. Sometimes you don't know enough about someone to decide, so a date is way to get to know the person. However it seems you know enough already. If he's appearing clingy even without a date, imagine what he'll be like after.

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Good question! I completely understand you not wanting to lead the guy on romantically and hurt his feelings.<br />
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I personally would NOT go out on a "date" with him - especially because a) you know that he likes you a lot romantically already b) you have spent time with him and got kinda tired of him. Plus, I'm the kinda person that feels you need to (I want to) have romantic feelings for the person to go out with them on a date in the first place( THUS, I am still single lol)<br />
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It doesn't matter that he is a "nice" guy. If you aren't feeling it, and kinda already KNOW that you aren't gonna feel romantic about him, is it really OK to be going on a date with a guy that has romantic feelings for you?????<br />
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I know most of my friends and people around me would say it's just a date and that there is nothing wrong with going out on a date with someone. I guess it all depends on how you (and he)defines what a date is. To me, a date is something more/different than just going out or hanging out with someone. Be upfront about your intentions. If you want to go out with him just to hang out, then tell him that. Let him know that you want to get to know someone better before you take things further than just friendship.<br />
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I'm not the best person to be giving any advice. I hang-out with people(guys) but never go on "dates" LOL. Apparently I give off the I-just-want-to-be-friends vibe. .... so I never get asked.... <br />
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Good luck

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I am in the same situation at the moment. There's this guy that I wasn't quite sure about, there are days when he would kind of annoy me but he's really not that bad of a guy. He's a little misunderstood but he's cute, sweet, and makes me feel accepted but at the same time I'm not completely sure that I'm ready to start something serious with him. What I am going to do is go on the date with him, I just want to get to know him more as a person but I'm not looking for it too be too serious at the moment (so I told him I want to take it slow, I don't want it to get too serious too fast). After a couple dates I will decide if I like him like he likes me<br />
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Now this other guy (I knew he liked me but he really annoyed me and he was a little too immature for me. I tried to be friends with him but he kept taking it as I wanted to go out with him) That's were I knew I wanted to draw the line and not go out with him (I have standards haha)<br />
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So go with your gut: If you want to know this guy more, do it but if he just doesn't meet your standards, let it go. Besides, it's just a date, see if you have feelings for him but don't take too long because if you don't you will lead him on. Good luck!

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It's too bad that people can't just date anymore, and get to know one another. Here you are, worrying about "breaking the heart" of someone you've seen twice. Both you and he should have the opportinuty to see each other a half-dozen times or more, without any pressure, to just get to know one another. but the way things are now - so intense, yet so casual, people can't just date.

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It's just a date. Go with that thought and you'll be fine. He's not asking you to marry him lol. Maybe this date will confirm how you feel about him, maybe this date will confirm he actually doesn't like you himself, maybe you will like him, maybe you'll both just have so much fun, get the drift? You'll never know for sure unless you go. Sometimes the littest things at the start of getting to know someone that we find annoying are the same things we end up liking most about them. I bet you might actually start liking him lol.

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I have never been asked on a date, I usually asked. lol

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