Well if you never done it before than scared nervous don t think bout it it s not that big inportant when your ready in love you ll know it will come natural and be great! thats the best way. wait till ready don t let any one presure ya into it. every one diff.
deff. the thought is giving you bad memorys. you need be with some one real comfitable that will be realy nice slow and gental .so it will be a nice exsparance that will give you a great memory and keep you wanting to repete it.
It could easily be rape trauma, even though you were only "nearly raped." Who would be excited to have sex after that?
Because you don't like it.
Nervous excitement, the mind and body know the joys and are in great anticipation there of....happens often.
Taking deep breaths helps to calm down.