When you live together, pay for things together, and WANT to marry each other... what is the "acceptable" amount of time
To get engaged...
I want to be engaged at least a year before I'm married, so it's not an issue of "let's get married right now" we were just discussing it and I figured I'd gather some other people's opinions on appropriate time length. I'm sure I've asked this before, but I usually get answers like "Never" or "When you truly Love each other and feel connected as Friends AND Lovers" or something.
But I just want an amount of time, and why you think that amount.
we realize we don't need "permission" to be married, but we respect our families and don't want it to seem rushed. ((even though we already live together))
10 Answers to "When you live together, pay for things together, and WANT to marry each other... what is the "acceptable" amount of time"
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then length of time is unimportant...if you have the same goals...can't not ever see yourself without waking up or going to bed without them...and they make you the best you can be and you do the same for them...then decided where you want to be married...that has more to do with it then anything cause depending on what you want it can be 2 weeks to 2yrs... Good Luck to you both :)
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6 months, I would think. Enough time to see each other at your best, and more importantly, your worst. But if you really love each other, Deciding to marry is a great, loving committment. And you're right about the engagement lasting a year... you'll be glad you did.. and those helping you will be too. You get a whole year to plan! And that's a big part of the fun.
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In your case, it is exactly as you stated, one year. That one year that you have decided in your mind is you logically reasoning one way or another to come to that specific conclusion, it is just fine that way. There is no real answer to this, just an answer ba
sed on everyone's own perception of what a good amount of time is. The real answer is that there is no amount of time that will be the answer of whether you and your partner will stay together just ba sed on this criteria. Like (1)
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Me and my boyfriend have been together 6 years total, 2 of the years we lived eaither at his dads house or mine, then the last 3 we've had out own apartment. I've slept next to him every night for about 5 years, In that time, I've though we might not end up together for ever, right now it don't seem to bad... I still don't know for sure, LoL
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I think a year to 18 months as you need time to set a date and plan the wedding. I never understood why people have long never ending engagements its not like marriage changes anything unless your saving up for the wedding but more than three years saving is crazy it means you need to rethink what you can afford and stop being silly and over spending. A year is enough time to get everything done, 18 months if anyone will have to travel a long distance and would need lots of notice. Hope this helps
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Why wait?
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Is it it the point of marriage? For me it was the other way. First marry, and then live together.
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Ever couple has a different idea... whatever you two agree on is fine, there is no "rule"
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If you both want to marry each other and you already are living together and sharing everything, I see no reaon to wait at all.
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Best Answer (Chosen by Voting):
Posted by FlauntTheImperfections Jul 2nd, 2012 at 10:15PM
Personally, I don't believe in setting an arbitrary time on something that does not have one. A couple gets engaged because they want to be married not because they want to eventually get married. If you say a year, would it be spoiled at 11 months or too late at 13? It would have no bearing on the outcome what so ever.
How about letting the circumstances determine the time for you? Get engaged and start planning your wedding. If you want to have a big to-do, you will likely have to wait over a year for the church and reception reservation anyway so there you go.
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