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I've been talking to a guy I kind of like and even though it has only been about a week, we have really bonded and there is a bit of chemistry that we are both amazed at. He is already bringing up questions about s3x and my preferences and dislikes, etc. My question is, when is it too soon for it to be discussed? I don't want to seem easy and I want a serious relationship, not a fwb. Do I discuss it with him with the clear statement that it doesn't mean I will be s3xual with him? Or is even discussing it inappropriate this early?
SpiritOfTheRabbit SpiritOfTheRabbit 31-35, F 25 Answers Jan 14, 2013 in Singledom

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I think this answer would be different with anyone you may ask. I personally would not put a time on it, just talk about it when you're comfortable. Just because you may discuss it with him doesn't mean you have to act on it right away.

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It can vary but talking about the likes and dislikes at an early stage esp. if you have not done it seems like the guy is scoping out a potential prude. He sounds like he like sex just a little bit too much. Personally I think that is weird.

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I was worried about that too.

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I mean just hinting about intimacy at a early stage of a relationship is pushing it. But talking about likes and dislikes ? - oh man - sounds like this guy is trouble - because it is not going to taper down - if anything it will escalate up.. Do yourself a favor and be careful - I mean dump him, there are a lot of guys out there.

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I will mull that over.

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mull away .

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Just ask his general thoughts on it...and don't deny any passion later. You don't have to engage in sex, just because you discuss it.... Be an independent lady and own your libido.

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Women over-think this.<br />
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I've been in a 5-year relationship with a girl I had sex with the night I met her, and in equally serious relationships with girls who didn't "put out" for months. My wife is a woman I knew I could have the moment I laid eyes on her - and I was right, 2 drinks and a kiss and it was home to bed. We argue about who played who that night, actually ;)<br />
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It just depends on too many factors for there to be one hard-and-fast (badum bum) rule.

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I would be DOING it instead of talking about it...but that's just me.

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well discussing s3x is not the same as having s3x.. so there's nothing wrong with talking about it, through conversation you can let the guy know that you want a relationship, don't want to rush into s3x, etc.. but there is also nothing wrong with stating that you are not yet comfortable discussing certain topics..

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I would discuss it with him but completely disguise it in inappropriate innuendos. Or you could just play him any of the bloodhound gang's music. No really though, if he's bringing it up and you're comfortable, I don't see why not. But if you're uncomfortable with it then wait a while longer.

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Will talking about it with him so soon make him take our potential less seriously? Will he think of me as an easy hook up?

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Well I don't see any harm in letting him know that you're looking for something serious! If that seems to be a big turn off for him, then it's not because that's just not one of those things you shouldn't ask, it's because he wasn't. Two adults should absolutely be able to talk about what they want out of a relationship/ potential relationship. Being on the same page is important.

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Thank you

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If U met him on a dating site - he is looking for sex - period.

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3 to 6 dates is appropiate enough

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I ask my potential date about her beliefs about sleeping together BEFORE the first date. The women that I date already know that sex will be part of our relationship, as soon we are comfortable with each other, which is sooner rather than later. I'm not saying that I have slept with every date, because we may decide we're just not right for each other. But I am saying that I don't date women who say they will not consider sleeping with me, especially if they claim they are waiting to get married. To me, sex is a form of intimacy, like touch and kissing, and talking about my deepest feelings. It's not a "secret" or something I am saving for someone. Sex is part of a healthy relationship.

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If there's chemistry, right away.

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I usually have sex first then talk about how good it was afterward.

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i don't actudally have a specified period, but anyways, in my last relation.s. we started discussing sex after the first 3 months

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I use sex as an ice breaker.

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?

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LOL! Sometimes that works :D

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In may experiences their is no real talk of it till long after.

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You're already there, now you decide how much more you want to discuss. Good luck.

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Right after hello.....IF you feel the chemistry

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Well he already asked you the questions she must of had answers to them....

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