Why are people who say they love you not capable of loving you?

When a person tells you that s/he loves you, you have certain expectations. Many times people are not capable of loving you in the way you want to be loved.
People love you, but they love you in their own way.
If we can learn to accept people as they are and accept their love as they can give it, we would have a more harmonious life.
Is this easy? To be honest, it is one of the hardest things to do in life. Howver, it can be done and is worth working towards.

I think we hurt really bad those who love us the most. Because those who don't care, won't get hurt badly. I've hurt people i care about but it doesn't mean I'm not capable of loving them. But if it happens constantly, then I guess you have a right to doubt their love.

Cos many people these days are false and shallow...They tell you what you want to hear,..mostly to be popular and 'get ahead'....Meanwhile they could not give a rats whisker about you...So yair,..its normal..
Thats why many people prefer to just type into EP,..where theres less vested interest,..and more likelihood of peoples true side coming out.

A sister's love is unconditional and will last a lifetime. It is a funny kind of love because you could be fighting like cats and dogs, but if you were in need or in a terrible situation, your sister would be there for you in a heartbeat!

Because they don't really understand what real love is. We all have our own definitions. I'm not religious but the definition in the Bible is pretty acurate, in my opinion - 'Love is long suffering and kind, love is not jealous, it does not brag, does not get puffed up, does not behave indecently, does not look for it's own interests,' etc. When someone says they love you, what they sometimes mean is that they are infatuated with you. This kind of 'love' encorporates many of the things listed like jealousy, selfishness etc. Real love is about putting the other person before yourself. I think that if you do do this you are within your rights to expect this love to be returned, however people bring a lot of baggage and bad education to relationships, so some people's idea of what love is , is distorted and damaged.

I disagree with the assumption behind the question. I believe that the limited number of people who said they loved me really did.

The misunderstanding of love affects every family across the world in some form or another. A simple answer to your question is some people are never taught. Growing up, I have no recollection of my dad telling me he loved me. About four years ago we argued, fist faught, said the big " love you" with a hug for the 1st time in nearly a couple of decades. I'm now twenty seven. Nowadays we hardly say it, but we know it's there. A couple of years ago my dad and I were talking when he mentioned my grandparents never told him they loved him. Suddenly it all started to make sense. But ya know, it didn't matter that the knowledge of love wasn't there, at the time hearing the words was all that counted. I think everyone wishes he/she knew how to love, well they should anyway! :)