Why are some women offended by pre nuptial agreements? Are the ones who are offended by these agreements the ones 2watch

Asked By: Blackstallion76 36-40, M 1 year ago

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Posted by RogerThompson May 1st, 2013 at 10:56AM

there should be a standing agreement to all marriages not only when you dissolve a marriage but how each will fufill the roles by each party. Even with the pressure of the church doing pre marital counselling people don't put the proper time and respect it needs to insure that everything will work out rather than trusting it will work out because of the love you have. Prenuptials should be seen as how do you demonstrate love when 'out' of love rather than if you need them you simply don't trust them.

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Posted by NightWolf13 Dec 11th, 2012 at 11:55AM

As previously commented, its all about trust. If my significant other asked for a pre-nup, I would be deeply hurt. To me, its like the beginning of the end before it even gets started. There shouldn't be an escape plan on love or marriage("or" because I realize, unfortunately, they don't always go together.) As for women who are offended by the prospect, since I'm guessing that is the majority, no, you don't need to "watch out" for them. Everyone is different, you can't base your entire impression of a person on such a small detail.

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Reply by Blackstallion76 Dec 11th, 2012 at 12:01PM

In that case there should be no "divorce", but ther is so why are most offended if asked to sign a pre nup? Of course nobody plans on a divorce, well at least not supposed to plan on it, but some people do plan for a divorce. Its like "insurance". Nobody plans on an accident, but they are prepared. So once again, why are people offended when it comes to prenup?
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Reply by NightWolf13 Dec 11th, 2012 at 12:14PM

Because, like myself, they don't agree with you that a pre-nup is like insurance. In many cases, a pre-nup doesn't end up protecting both parties, whereas insurance(if the company is doing the right thing anyway) protects anyone it is purchased for. Also, emotions are involved with a pre-nup, not so much with insurance. Well, there is that slight cringe when you have to pay for it, but im guessing that there are very few people who love their insurance. People are offended because it feels like distrust. Whether that is reasonable or not, and I'm going to use a nerd reference here, emotions aren't reasonable, and since we aren't vulcans, people aren't always reasonable either. Sometimes you just don't have an easy explanation for why something offends you.
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Posted by Goldenbear18 Apr 7th, 2012 at 8:58PM

Although it's a good thing to protect you it can be offensive because if I remember correctly in a marriage you become one meaning both of you share everything including money. Marriage is about trust so by asking for a pre nup it's like saying I don't trust you and I don't really care about you if we end things because I want to keep my money all to myself and you keep yours. Yes some of them are gold diggers others are not.

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Posted by Christy421 Apr 5th, 2012 at 9:19PM

I think it should be a law that everyone have one. I know that if I were ever to plan on getting married again and she had money/business I would demand she got one just so she wouldn't have to worry.

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Posted by luvsall3232 Apr 5th, 2012 at 10:07AM

yes, those are the gold diggers

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Posted by mummydiaries Apr 5th, 2012 at 9:59AM

It's a tough one because getting ready for marriage is such an exciting and positive time in your life and pre nuptials represent a bitter end to marriage. It's kind of like smearing a bit of dog poop all over your big day. On the other hand with the rate of divorce rising so rapidly and second and third marriages becoming so common, it is a reality for people who have assets they want to protect and even more so when children are in the picture. I don't think those who are offended need to be 'watched' but rather the discussion needs to be had in a more gentle way and as early as possible into the relationship once marriage is the path you both see for yourself - just so expectations on the topic a set and everyone has a good understanding of each others feelings. Signing one the day before your wedding sets an awful tone for the celebrations to follow....:)

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Reply by Blackstallion76 Apr 5th, 2012 at 1:52PM

I think of it like insurance, you don't plan on having an accident, but you have piece of mind, but most females don't see it that way, if you bring up the topic just while dating, they get upset. So what do you think the deal is with that.
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Reply by mummydiaries Apr 5th, 2012 at 5:59PM

Your analogy is spot on and I personally have no issues with per nuptial agreements, but it is a tough pill to swallow when you are getting ready to commit your life to someone. No one likes to think of it ending before it has begun. I think as time goes on it will become more accepted - like insurance or a Will - people will start to realise just how important a pre nup actually actually is and that it is there's to protect both parties. Which takes me to the next point that most people don't actually understand what they are or their rights.
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Posted by TheSquirrel Apr 5th, 2012 at 9:55AM

Some people think that because they tell you now they love you and would never do that, that will will love you and never do that. And then they do. They do not think they could ever change their minds.

Then there are those who know dam well that they will take you for everything that you have when the time suits them, and they want to leave that option open.

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Posted by ratskolnikov Apr 5th, 2012 at 9:53AM

I think you are the one to watch out for. Why are you anticipating the end?

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Reply by Blackstallion76 Apr 5th, 2012 at 11:03PM

You did not read carefully either Rahskolnikov
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Posted by likeliness Apr 5th, 2012 at 9:47AM

planning for the marriage to end, that is not the way to go into a life long committment. If your afraid it is going to end, don't get married.

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Posted by smiley194 Apr 5th, 2012 at 9:47AM

Yes, watch out for any which reason... Do not marry without a prenup, EVER!

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Posted by Rtfm76 Apr 5th, 2012 at 9:44AM

i think its because your planning for the end before its even begun.

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Reply by Blackstallion76 Apr 5th, 2012 at 11:02PM

Obviously, you did not read carefully. Rtfm76
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Reply by Rtfm76 Apr 6th, 2012 at 2:53AM

i've answered why someone may be offended, as to who to look out for? who knows? even with a pre nup, u can still be ripped off.
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