Why can't I get over my husbands affair?

Because he promised you forever and once forever is broken it's gone forever. BUT you can heal in time if he really is sorry. However not many men actually are sorry- they just want to avoid further conflict. It is up for you to decide if he is so sorry that he looks at you and cringes at the hurt he caused you and will again from this day forth love you and only you.

I disagree with loyaldude. It is not because you have a low self esteem problem ( that is the easy way out to excuse an infidelity ) you are hurt because you were betrayed not only physically but emotionally and those wounds take time to heal.

As many have said - time might help. But do you want to get over it? If you really want to, then you will find a way. If you are over him, you may never forgive entirely.

Because you feel inadequate and have a self esteem problem. If you were confident with your being and how you look at life in a positive manner making sure that you do everything that is humanly possible then you have nothing to worry about. Knowing who you are will get you through everything and a husband having an affair has everything to do with your husband. He has to reflect the reasons why he had the affair.

Anger and hurt are very strong emotions and very hard to get over. Perhaps counseling or talking to someone about it will help? Sorry for your hurt.

Simply because you do not wish to.....take it from someone that did get over one...

If you really want to....and take him back....Then you will....If you toss him away....Then it is time to get one with your life....The next step is up to you....But any thing that you do....It is up to you to decide to get over it....and get on with your life.....It will make you a happier person

you know you deserve better...now you have to find that out for yourself...good luck and remember...men have been cheated on too..some of us understand...

because he cheated? duh.

I agree with Denverguy....
talking it out with someone will help... give it a try
take care of yourself

I agree with (Misslinseyanne). You can nerver "Get over it", nor should you. He took a VOW with YOU. He broke the vow. Do not accept ANY excuses from him. Move on and make yourself happy. He will only cheat again. STRESS can kill you. He is not worth dying for.

Good Luck to you.

Because you associate your emotions with his. Men cheat due to lack of sexual attention. Don't don't crave the drama and "love" emotions women strive for! Yes the breech of trust is a major issue but, move on everyone screws up sometimes! just my 2¢?

As a man I'm almost afraid to put this down in print for fear you may actually like the idea. But here goes. I got this from a female friend of the family who went through it. But I caution that she is a very direct and proactive person.
You won't forget your husbands infidelity, ever.
But if you want to get over it, you need to treat him totally like the lying, cheating SOB that he is for long enough so that you actually start to feel sorry for him. Then apologise and forgive him. She claimed that restored her sense of justice, which allowed her to move on. He was so grateful when his sentence was over he has never strayed since.

Sorry, its because you loved him and he betryed you in the worst way. Hes supposed to love you and care for you. You have invested time in this man and expeced him to uphold his marriage vows and now you realize these were just words spocken at the time, you wonder and wonder if theres something you did or didn't do. It's horrible to compair but something every person must thing of like they were the best and now those feelings are tanted feelings that want to be repaired yet we hold on to this even if we want to let go. sorry for you hold on you know whats best for you.

Because the man you devoted your life to betrayed you.

I have to ask. Was there problems before the affair? I only ask this because I am divoiced now and didn't find out about an affair till after we separated. Thats why I went ahead with the divoice.

Looking back we had a very rocky marraige. I thought he was just a nag. There was always something I wasn't doing right. Now I think it was his way of trying to communicate his nagging I mean. So before you past judgement on him think about things long and hard and forgiveness will come either way.

I am sorry it came to this I know it hurts your heart is broken. Time will heal it and you will find peace again.