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I've noticed how all the men I've been with try to come back into my life. I feel once its done its done so I ignore them. Is it the type of man? Hoping to get a mans point of view. I don't really care about them but there is obviously a pattern.
vcost1 vcost1 18-21, F 23 Answers Nov 11, 2012 in Dating & Relationships

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You left things open for them.

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Pls elaborate on that

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There's a psychological reasoning behind it that happens with many relationships. Basically two people get used to a certain dynamic and when you do something to change that one side will try to correct that imbalance. You end up with what you're experiencing, until they gradually move on. Is there anything that bothers you in particular with how your relationships end?

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Hmmm out of all their exes why me though. Why Dont they reconnect with another ex or woman

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It's happened to me plenty of times. Most of my break ups were amicable. So even though we went our separate ways, we remained friends.



If they're coming back to continue a relationship, you've either left that door open for them somehow, or your communication with them sends the message that it's an option. Most men, when given clear instructions that they are to stay away and move on, and that nothing will come of anything, will do just that.

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Wow this answer is great and opened my mind. What if they broke up with me? And want to come back? I just Dont get it like move on

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Even if they broke up with you, you need to make it clear that it doesn't matter who instigated it. They made their decision, and as far as you're concerned it's final.

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I agree 100%

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Well, for one you're quite attractive in your picture. And I also imagine that it's because they miss you, and if they miss you then you must have done something right :P You were probably a decent human being to them and they realize this now that they don't have you anymore (:

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you are willing to do what their new GF's wont?

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Some people don't realize how good they've got it until it's gone...

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if you dont care about them then why does it bother you?

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Because I am obvi pulling a certain type of man. Unknowingly

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maybe.. or maybe youre ready too much into that..

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*reading

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I enjoy analyzing my life and questioning things. Not just this subject

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Because they realize they lost a good thing.

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oh my gosh mine do too. They are like a plague. Its like screw me over once and you had your chance

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because you are beautiful and seem sweet

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because that's exactly when you stop caring about them

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Im not a man, but Im guessing they realise what they had once they lost it. I've definitely had the same happen to me. My ex's have tried to come back -- no dice guys -- take me for granted and it's over!

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Whenever a man is without a girlfriend, it takes less effort to reconnect with some former girlfriend than to start from scratch with a stranger. The lesson to be learned for a woman is to be careful who you get involved with. They may haunt you for a lifetime.

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Hm this is interesting. I agree. This would then mean I subconsciously date a certain type right?

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Facebook wouldn't be popular, if a desire to reconnect didn't exist in all of us. But yes. Maybe you do date a certain type, i.e. the loser type or the stalker type. The first question that a woman should ask herself, before dating anybody is: Am I going to be able to get rid of this guy, if it doesn't work out?

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Very true! I honestly don't know why this happens...but these are good theories.

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I have read several books on stalking, authored by criminologists. You might be able to find them in your public library. My advice to you is the same as their advice. If any ex-boyfriend is a nuisance, then be very aggressive and blunt in asking him to leave you alone. Leave no doubt in his mind that he must never contact you again. This is the only way to destroy his fantasy that he has a chance to revive the relationship. And if he persists after that, then get a restraining order from the court. People have to learn that "no" means "no".

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Thankyou.

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Because your so gorgeous, your so amazing, your perfect, 'if i was chocolate i would eat myself'

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Lol im far from perfect! But thank you

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