:( what's the matter?
you sound either overwhelmed or depressed right now; do you have a good friend or grownup you can reach out to try to decipher all the feelings you may be experiencing right now?
I'm willing to listen, if you want. In any case, don't give up or despair. We all go through very trying testing times in our lives sometimes. Life can seem unbearable at times. You've got someone, a lot of people here, who understand.
you're welcome. You are stronger than you think. Remember and reflect upon that.
You should smoke a cigar. That will help. I know it's not the best, but it will help.