something is missing
Cheating never really means that the love between the 2 people are gone...
It's not about the looks, most time it's about what happens in the relationship which will lead someone to stray. No I don't agree with cheating..
Now this answer I can't accept, the problem with the question is that there is a multitude of reasons why people have affairs and although some may well be selfish, there has to be a whole host of reasons for an affair. Even on EP I have read about situations where one partner may be severely disabled or in constant pain and on high doses of meds. In this situation the other partner is nothing more than a carer. What should they do?
My beautiful, smart, wonderful wife showed no interest in sex. From the beginning of our marriage, we had sex oce every two or three months. She always seemed either put out or awkward.
It was like the passion of the romance subsided, as it always does - and sex was something she HAD to do. Now, I am very adventurous sexually and made clear that I would be thrilled to do whatever turned her on. That the only thing I know I don't like is pain.
Well, she insisted she never had fantasies. Really? Sounds more like shame, inhibitions or some other issue. She also said she didn't **********. Maybe once or twice a year. Really?
We were in couples therapy within two years of our wedding! Initially she offered several things she thought were the reason. All of them having to do with her. Not with me. She would tearfully ask me not to give up on her. And I didn't. The shame is that by any other measure we got along wonderfully and enjoyed each other's company.
I relieved myself by ************, with which she said she had no problem. No kiddin'. It got her off the hook. But then I started using internet ****. And although previously I was among those who scoffed at the notion of sex addiction, I'm here to say it does.
The chemical release becomes addictive, and like a drug addict, one spends as much time pursuing that comfort as one can. It becomes an obsessive/compulsive problem. It truly is a curse.
One of the characteristics is, as with other addictions, you build a resistance to what you started with, usually one on one straight sex. Then you engage in escalation in order to get the same stimulation the "normal" stuff you started with.
Your tastes become increasingly exotic. Soon, you're seeking out, and easily finding, what most people would consider perverted and sickening. It got so exciting and intense that it no longer seemed worth it to pursue sex with a woman who wasn't interested.
I'd stay up late in my office "working", indulging my lewd and lascivious interests. SHE never complained or showed any interest in having sex. In my pornographic fantasy world, not only were they always willing and waiting, they never rejected me. And far from being repulsed by my prurient interests, they were into it too!
Of course, then it escalated to chat rooms and extremely graphic cyber sex. That was a different high altogether. Then the assorted sex sites. Then Craigslist and the other free and easy hook up sites.
Utterly frustrated with a wife who would rebuff my sexual advances, act like I was some sort of freak because I occasionally wanted to see and touch my wife's naked body. The rejection was horrible.
So finally, I was enticed into trying gay sex. I'd dabbled three times as a kid and it was fun, but as is the case with almost all males, stigma makes you stop that and switch to girls exclusively. And I loved sex with women.
But I think my subconscious decided that, while screwing another woman was obviously cheating, somehow getting head from a guy wasn't. And it seemed more taboo. Which it was and which I like.
Besides, this guy said he swallowed, and that was an experience I'd never had. So I did it. And it was intense. ******* in a "******'s" mouth and watching him show how much he loved it as he jerked off was so forbidden.
Of course, post ******, you think, "What the hell did I do?!" I'll NEVER do that again!" But of course, when he hits your yahoo messenger asking for more, all reason fades.
So, after the next 4 years, I would repeat that action probably every 4 months. Swear to stop, but the need for real contact with someone who WANTS you eventually wins.
And soon you're not just receiving, you're GIVING head! Something you would NEVER have conceived doing. And you have to admit to yourself that you like it. And that you must be bi.
And that would have gone on forever if I had not been sloppy and left my "secret" email account open. My wife then read some of the most sordid, graphic material no one would ever want anyone in the real world to read.
My biggest, most destructive mistake was to admit what I'd done. I should have insisted it was all in the fantasy world. But once that genie is out of the bottle, it's never going back in. Which is why I am now going through a divorce.
Take my advice. Unless he/she catches you in the act, NEVER admit it. If she catches you coming out of a hotel with a woman, you admit you had set it up, but couldn't go through with it. NEVER, NEVER, EVER!! confess.
So, years of sexual frustration and rejection combined with internet **** addiction is why. I do regret it. For the pain I caused her, the pain my children are suffering, and the havoc I have wreaked on my own life.
its natural, men like to have adventure and try different things. men were originally created to have many wives to populate the earth, but after the population rose to a sufficient amount, god did not want there to be an overpopulation problem so he wanted men to have only one wife and began to allow homosexuality. i dont understand why god didnt make men to be satisfied with only one woman though (although many men are, its not universal)
Looks have nothing to do with it. People who think there is something better tend to never be happy with what they have. We need to simply enjoy what we have and find the true things that make us happy.
I personally think that it dosen't really matter how gorgeous your partner may be because looks dosen't always come with the mental and emotional support one may need. Basically, there's just something one is missing and the other will eventually clearly feels it, but not actually realized it... which causes their reason(s) for cheating. Because they probaly see/or feel it in someone else. So they're going to chase after it til they get it, but at the same time.., they still want to stay and be with their partner... whom they cheated on. Some don't consider it cheating, as others will consider it " extremely disrespectful and get really hurt at that fact and they will end their relationship" For me, personally, I'd ask him why? And if he's happy with me... After hearing his side of the story... I'd explain why I am ending and leaving this relationship. I look at it as my partner has no respect, obedience (obey), betrayed, and selfish with no morals or self control! I DO NOT AGREE WITH CHEATING!!!
well some thing took place while one was away and then it was some thing that just happend
because "familiarity breeds contempt " not saying its right , I'm just sayin.......
most of the time it stems from sexual frustrations
Because when it comes to some men their brains are wired wrong when it comes to their d**ks.