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anointedonee anointedonee 22-25 13 Answers Feb 8, 2012

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Many do, but I wouldn't be sure it was most. I think most guys want a committed loving relationship as much as women, they just want to be sure they got the right one before committing forever, whereas I get the impression women tend to on average decide that she's met the one she wants to settle down with faster, that's all.<br />
It's probably an evolutionary process. Both men and women are geared to making as many babies as possible, but they have different bits. A woman would need to start early and make sure she had a stable situation to raise them (evolutionarily) but a man would simply need to sex as many women as possible to get the most reproduction (again, this is evolutionarily speaking).<br />
While we're much more complex than that, the basic urges and processes are still there.

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There is a moment in a relationship when two people go from having fun to realizing that the fun has been going on more and more often and feelings are getting involved... It's kind of like, sex... they pull out before they make a commitment they're not ready for... Leonardo Da Vinci once wrote, " the acquisition of any knowledge is always useful to the intellect, for nothing can be either loved or hated until it is first known." remember this... I notice too often girls get very interested, very quickly. remind yourself, you probably don't even know the guy that well... step back... remember yourself... and if he's interested he'll take the time to get to know you, and you can get to know him... how do you even know if you want to be committed to him or not... seriously.... relationships lead to sex and babies, and half the time it goes so fast that you don't realize you're with someone only cuz you thought he was hot... I've seen it happen...many times.... remind yourself of who you are and what you want your life to look like... girls think with their hearts and guys with their middle leg... don't fall so quickly.... if you stand for nothing, you'll fall for anything.... stand up for yourself, and don't let him be the one who makes that decision... if the decision is only his, you've already lost the game.

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Because the person they are in the relationship with wouldn't really want them to get into a second comitted relationship. It can cause problems.

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I can't help but wonder if people really avoid commitment or others expectations of commitment are just different than theirs...

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My opinion. The first reason is short term goals. Women are biological programmed to make and maintain relationships. Men are biologically programmed to reproduce. Maintaining a relationship requires long term commitment. Reproducing, for the man, does not. So a women is more committed from the start.<br />
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Then we move on to the differences in a man's and woman's view of the world. Women look at life as relationships, and invests heavily in creating and maintaining those relationships. Men look at life as something to conquer, control, and compete in, so relationships tend to be a means to an end (sex, heirs, sex, companionship, sex, life partner, ....)<br />
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Because men are goal oriented, and marriage commitment is a means to an end, rather than an end in itself, men weigh the long term outcome and responsibilities more than women. The fact that men are still the primary financial support for the family adds to the concern and the "avoidance" of committing. <br />
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In summary, most women see marriage as "happy ever after." Most men see marriage as taking on huge responsibilities. Hence their tendency to "avoid commitment."

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They are unsure of what they want, leaving their options open, and honestly, I think they're a little afraid because they don't completely know how.

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If they're not committed then it's not a relationship to begin with--it's dating

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do they avoid commitment with you?

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general question

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