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I guess I asked to basically answer a question I have seen on various posts, in different forms: 'Why are men so mean?' or 'Why are black women so mean?', etc.... As far as what the definition of mean is, I am wondering in the way of what your own personal experience has been and what you have learned. Have you felt you were mean? Was there a reason? What was the reason?
OnewithJC OnewithJC 36-40, F 13 Answers Mar 2, 2011

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Stress, failing relationships. poverty, illness, death, sorrow, self pity, anger, depression, unemployment, hunger, hormones, abuse, alcohol, drugs, criminal victimization, domestic violence, no money, heart break, no health insurance, poor or no housing, and other general tragedies of life. Not everyone can walk the good walk every day, no matter what they are facing privately. Usually mean behavior is about some kind of consuming inner pain. We need to apply compassion when others disppoint us.

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I think people are operating under pressures and stresses we don't always understand. And what we think of as horrible and mean and rude may just seem like normal behaviour to some people, because they are so socially inept they don't understand that they are being mean. And then there are the mean people who do it on purpose....because it's fun.

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Very well thought out answer, I agree. Thanks for sharing...:-)

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define meanness

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Good one, now you got me thinking again......I'll be back... :-)<br /><br />
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So did the added details to my post help? I hope so....:-D

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Maybe they don't intend to be mean, it's just that they've got a sarcastic sense of humour.

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True....:-) a conflict in communication.....

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Maybe you're not picking up on clues, or unable to understand what they want, and they get annoyed with you. <br />
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Have you considered, that if this always seems to happen to you, then maybe the problem is with YOU? Maybe you're being paranoid and over-sensitive, and seeing a problem where there is none. It's really hard to say, because you haven't given us any information, and your question is very self-serving.<br />
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Edit: Well played, sir.

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You are right I didn't give much in the way of information. I hope I added some useful information. Has no one ever been mean to you? Have you never been mean to anyone? As for whether there is a problem or not, I have not said. I asked a general question, that's all. :-D

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1 might not know the reason bhind the "mean" attitude of the other...but there always is a reason to it!!

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Is there? I would agree if having no reason is a reason in itself.

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i noticed they did that to take a piece of your self esteem and add it to their own..<br />
another reason is if you are a true Christian

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Ah, so it makes them feel good because they feel like they did something, even if it was to make someone feel bad? <br /><br />
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But if someone needs to take someone else's self esteem, to "add to their own", is that a real self-esteem? I just don't get it....<br /><br />
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What do you mean about if you are a true Christian?

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