Why do people stay in miserable, abusive relationships/marriages?

Fear of change and the unknown. Humans are creatures of habit. You get used to pain, you sometimes forget it's even there, or you can fool yourself into believing it's normal for it to be there,...out of habit.

IMO, the EXCUSES like "what about the kids", "have no money", "where do i/we go?", etc etc are all what they are. Those things can be taken care of; they're all just incidentals. The bottom line is lack of self-esteem/ self love.
I can hear all the "oh it's not that simple" comments now.
Yes, it is.
BTW, been on both sides: as a child of abuse and as an adult.
Good luck to anyone going through this right now.

thinking about that today-a friend's partner blocked me from speaking with her..=/

FEAR and insecurities.

some people fear they won't find another person to love them. they don't want to be alone.

Because they lack self confidence and, for lack of a better word, balls. They think they deserve abuse and therefore, put up with it. Not me. I say if any man every abuses me, he gets the burning bed and I go to prison with a smile on my face. 8^)

Lack of spine. Kids should never be a reason to stay with a person like this, hell, it should be more of a reason to leave. How do you think your kid feels when daddy is beating on mommy? Also, the mother (or father) is teaching their child that it's ok to stay with someone who abuses you, and the father (or mother) is teaching the kid it's ok to abuse.

People who stay with people they don't love for the kids is stupid.

well, besides having kids together there's:
lack of money
having no place to go
being insecure
lack of confidence

there's no trust in yourself or other people:
feel stupid for being in the relationship in the first place and blaming all on yourself - leaving won't help if it's all your own fault anyway, right?
there's an inability to trust many people so as to get help from others
you feel guilty as if leaving is hurting or doing something wrong to your abusive spouse
leaving or to even think of it feels like betraying them

there's being afraid of what happens if you do leave:
how will it work out? or will it work out?
will i be safe?
worrying about things:
will i be able to support myself and kids?
what will my family and friends think?
how will he and his family react?
what will my kids think? will they hate me?
is there really a safe way out?
is this truly the end for me?
can i find peace and/or happiness if i leave?

it seems like such a simple thing to just walk away, but it's so freakin hard

Is that Optimus Prime in your Avatar?

Yes many do...I left...and I have never looked back!

Newton's first law of mechanics states that, unless acted upon by forces, a body at rest will remain at rest or a body in motion will remain in motion moving with the same speed and direction.

Fear of change.

It depends on the relationship! If abusive, then it's most likely because of fear. Sometimes it is due to finances, others just for the kids. Different reasons!

Weareone has this one hands down. I just got out of such a relationship on October 3rd of this year. Was in it for almost 17 years and at first it was due to the kids and that I wanted things to work out. He just got worse and is STILL trying to do really stupid things.

define "miserable" and "abusive"

because they are scared to leave as they think the person will find them&make their life even worse!&because they feel its all their fault,so they feel they dont deserve a loving marriage/relationship xx

Ok well here's my story. "What had happened was" I was raised to never ever ever let a man put a hand on me. Of course if any man ever tried to my foot would up his *** under 5 seconds flat. Anyhow, I understood and rationalized what the concepts of emotional and mental abuse are. However, in my past relationship, I made excuses for my ex. For instance, his ex wife would call him, yell at him, he'd hang up the phone, and let out his anger on me by either yelling at me, neglecting me, or just being a total Pric*. My excuse for that behavior was "he's a good man going through bad things right now, and I'm sure that when its over, he'll change." He didn't. He got worse. Because I had given him so many chances to use me and abuse me (without me realizing it) he continuously lied, manipulated and tormented me. He used his friends to even manipulate me, or how I thought. Make the long story short... I realized now what I did wrong, and I should slap myself on the face because of all people I should have known better (I have a BA in Psychology, hence I was aware of what a mental and abusive relationship entails), but I guess that love is indeed very blind, and in some cases very dangerous. =[

It is cheaper to stay together and bear through it thank goes through a messy expensive divorce, that costs a lot of money time and pain.

Why do you think the Pharmaceutical companies are cleaning up in the anti depressant medicines

i was also blocked by a friends partner because he did not like the comment i wrote