I agree, you can be real and still have tact.
When my mother died, one of her coworkers came to her funeral. My mother did not like this woman, however she seemed sincere and had nothing but nice things to say.
All I could say to her was "Ah, yes, my mother spoke of you often". It was not a lie....
Ok then, "yes, your new haircut does make you look like a very unattractive boy and the fact that you've put on 30 during your prenacy makes you pretty unappealing. you're right, your sister is much prettier than you. Yes, it's true you're not very intelligent. I do think it's your fault all these horrible things happen. No, it's not likely you'll amount to much considering you're not smart, wealthy, or pretty....Monsters are real, and one day when I'm not around, they may come and hurt you and there won't be anything you can do about it...."