it is damagin to the children.......i have no idea why parents think this is a good idea.......or maybe they don't think at all?!
very damaging. a parent who constanlty claims to love all the kids the same: yet is very obviously biased with favortism right down the line
Sibling rivalry can have a contributary effect, as can oldest/youngest favouritism, everyone is different and everyone reacts differently to every situation. Firstly I must add, I'm divorced and both my girls now live away from home. I have two daughters who I love unconditionally but to be honest if I had to choose, I'd say I LIKE my eldest daughter better, we bonded much more throughout her life, right from being a baby, she's got a much more understanding nature, she's more forgiving and in no way stubborn which my youngest daughter is. My youngest daughter cares for no one but herself and shows no interest in others especially when they are unwell. (Myself and my parents included) I always play fair and treat both my girls equally in every respect, I always will, but it always comes back to their own personal behaviour.
Easy answer....<br />
"That child reminds them of themself"
they see him/her either promising, or because he/she resembles this parent more!
I try to treat all of my kids the same. But if one is constantly testing your patience, doing things he/she knows is wrong, etc,. then it's hard not to be nicer to the other one(s).
The first born always gets the most love unconditionally.. that will always be their "baby"<br />
The 1st born can do NO WRONG!!.<br />
If there are two other younger children, then the 2nd one will always be in the shadow of the first one. <br />
Middle children have it kinda rough.<br />
Lastly, if there is a third child...that will be the baby and the envy of the other 2 children.
Not always. Especially not if that first child was the unpreferred gender of the parent(s) for a first child, and they subsequently have a child of the preferred gender. Or, they'll cling to the youngest one, because they want to keep their "baby". This does a great disservice to all of the children.