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Why do women reject nice guys, and give the guys that are jerks a chance?

A friend asked me this question and I said it wasn't true at first, but then I realized that this does actually happen. I didn't know what to tell him, but it really got me thinking. Anybody have any theories?

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    Best Answer (Chosen By Asker):

    Spann0r - 26-30 years old - male

    Posted by Spann0r 1 Jan 23rd, 2013 at 7:11PM

    Not sure if they conscientiously decide that, but I think not. Even though they should try to use their brain more often when choosing a partner...

    One theory is, that a nice guy, who is there for her and tells her how much he loves her is perceived as weak, boring, easy and/or desperate. He puts himself on the same level as her or even below her. Instead of enjoying it and giving this guy a chance, she decides she needs to aim higher. She doesn't want a guy she can have, she wants a guy, who is actually too good for her.
    A player exploits this -- he will lean back and act like he is too good for her, but stepping down from his throne of supremacy for a moment. Like he is actually doing her a favor by using her over the weekend.

    The other theory is, she doesn't feel like she deserves to be treated like a princess and can't accept the nice guy. Like a woman who can't accept a simple compliment with a nice "thank you", but starts arguing about how ugly she is. She don't feel worthy of a nice guy and throws herself in the arms of a jerk, who treats her the way she thinks she deserves to be treated.

    [ Reply ] | Like (5)

24 Answers to "Why do women reject nice guys, and give the guys that are jerks a chance?"

  1. WaterLily2012 - 18-21 years old - female

    Posted by WaterLily2012 Jan 23rd, 2013 at 6:55PM

    the nice guys aren't pushy enough to ask the right questions. they're nice and we dont relize what we lost till they're gone

    Like (4)

  2. pinkjade1 - 26-30 years old - female

    Posted by pinkjade1 Jan 23rd, 2013 at 6:59PM

    The guy she chooses is only a jerk because she didn't choose the nice guy. Nice guys aren't nice. They think they know what's best for women. They don't. They have a lil disease called Nice Guy Syndrome. Its okay for women to make their own choices on their mates. There is a reason nice guys will forever stay in the friend zone. And women do not enjoy being treated badly. And I have never once heard a woman confirm this lie. Its best for the nice guy to stop scape goating women and work on what's wrong with himself.

    Like (3)

  3. Nundochips - 31-35 years old - male

    Posted by Nundochips Jan 23rd, 2013 at 6:54PM

    Because the nice guys are to busy being nice to ask the right questions !

    Like (3)

  4. bijouxbroussard - 46-50 years old - female

    Posted by bijouxbroussard Jan 23rd, 2013 at 7:24PM

    I hear that, but because I've never been attracted to 'bad guys' it didn't compute. And not every guy who claims he's a nice guy actually is one.

    Like (2)

  5. Steve1127 - 46-50 years old - male

    Posted by Steve1127 Jan 23rd, 2013 at 7:15PM

    Because if women didn't have anything to complain about with their boyfriends they would go nuts.

    Like (2)

  6. AdamInChains - 41-45 years old - male

    Posted by AdamInChains Jan 23rd, 2013 at 7:05PM

    There is no challenge in a nice guy. No need to flex female charming powers because he is nice already. On the other hand, turning Big Boy Bad To The Bone into Mr. Responsible Family Dog with magic kisses always thrilled ladies...

    Like (2)

  7. dwaun32 - 31-35 years old

    Posted by dwaun32 May 4th, 2013 at 9:52PM

    Women are *******, they never like anything; unless it's under
    Their control, they control you speak to them and what you do
    With them, it's not fair, sugardaddy,com is more effective in meeting with women; who want someone to pay for their lifestyle, but they use you, too.

    Like (1)

  8. derkyrivers - 22-25 years old - male

    Posted by derkyrivers Apr 24th, 2013 at 6:20PM

    I just posted a similar question so it is now a known Fact women act like they want a nice guy but in fact like to be treated like crap.

    Like (1)

  9. abro4irfun - 31-35 years old - male

    Posted by abro4irfun Feb 18th, 2013 at 2:14AM

    Many women aren't attracted to the "nice" guys until a "jerk" is done with them.

    Like (1)

  10. crazychica369 - 22-25 years old - female

    Posted by crazychica369 Jan 23rd, 2013 at 7:50PM

    Girls like badboys they would rather have an ******* who uses them a human punching bag.

    Like (1)

  11. arenaissancewoman - 26-30 years old - female

    Posted by arenaissancewoman Jan 23rd, 2013 at 7:45PM

    it's the decision between being with someone sweet and safe or being with someone fun and dangerous.... sucks, but that the choice we have to make as women.

    Like (1)

  12. orchid00 - 26-30 years old - female

    Posted by orchid00 Jan 23rd, 2013 at 7:03PM

    Cuz the jerks as you call them (I would use a different word) have got game and if you're not on guard they'll get you to fall for their bs.

    Like (1)

  13. mbogo - 41-45 years old - male

    Posted by mbogo Jan 23rd, 2013 at 7:02PM

    Something about "bad boys" actually turns girls on - and they apparently think they can change them into the kind of guy they want - it is like a challenge. Nice guys are more like dad's or brothers and just don't get girls juices flowing.
    Huge numbers of girls date guys in prison.
    Case in point: If you have a big motorbike - and get a girl on the the back - you are MUCH more likely to get the girls to want to sleep with you - than if you just want to go to the movies. (yes - personal experience)
    Guys that pose no "risk" to girls are seen as safe - and friendly - and not sleeping material. This does not apply to all girls but to many of them - just look at how many footballers can have lots of girlfriends and how they will even put up with being treated like crap - just to spend a night with them.
    It seems crazy to us guys but it is a fact.
    If you look too much like a ***** - grow a beard or get some tats - do some sport or get a motorbike. Don't dress in pastels and wear clean shoes all the time - lol

    Like (1)

  14. tikki75 - 36-40 years old - male

    Posted by tikki75 Jan 23rd, 2013 at 6:59PM

    Some women see it as a challenge to turn a jerk into a nice guy.

    Like (1)

  15. lovesj - 31-35 years old - male

    Posted by lovesj Jan 23rd, 2013 at 6:58PM

    I have a theory that women like to "fix" people and as a result they take on the bad boy as someone they can fix. Bad boys represent a challenge. The nice guy is too easy, women want the challenge.

    Like (1)

  16. vkittenn - 18-21 years old - female

    Posted by vkittenn Jan 23rd, 2013 at 6:57PM

    Because some are stupid.

    Like (1)

  17. rattleschains - 41-45 years old - male

    Posted by rattleschains Jan 23rd, 2013 at 6:57PM

    Maybe women want to hang with nice guys, but their instinct tells them their children are better off growing up to be jerks.

    Like (1)

  18. SimonLaStrange - 41-45 years old - male

    Posted by SimonLaStrange Jan 23rd, 2013 at 6:55PM

    It is all about confidence. See guys just seem like jerks to you because they are loud and boisterous but to women they seem like stand up guys who would do what it takes.

    Like (1)

  19. phoeislost - 18-21 years old - female

    Posted by phoeislost Jan 23rd, 2013 at 6:55PM

    Because those women are not nice women but the nice guys don't go after nice women because they are hypocrites (the one's who claim this anyway). Oh my god I hate this whole friendzone thing so much.

    Like (1)

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