The best answer is right here. Unfortunately women live in a fantasy world. That is why they read those stupid romance novels. They also let magazines and television influence what they expect from men. They expect every guy to be powerfully rich and
live in a castle, have the body of a male model, and be able to jet off all around the world on a minute notice. Most of them do not live in reality and are centered on materialistic ob
Men live in a fantasy world. Watching too many movies or reading too many books where the hideous male best friend ends up with her because he's just SO NICE and she magically realizes this. Women are either attracted to you or they're not. Your best bet is to get lesser caliber of women you've been chasing or await old age when these women are desperate and no longer need sexual attraction, in which case your hideousness will not be a factor. I'm guessing men have preferences too, I don't see my fat female friends who are super "nice," maybe fake nice like misogynistic men like yourselves, but comparable, get the attention much more attractive women do. It's life, men just have big egos and can't make peace with things ugly women do. You and the lot of the men whining here are probably just like those "nice" ugly girls. You can be nice but you sure can't antagonize people for having preferences in their love interest, why don't you go after the ugly women? If women who do not want you must stop their preferences and be attracted to you for your being nice, then you should do the same. Go with the ugly girls who will be nice to you.
Wow! You go to any dating site and who is complaining more about having a bad relationships? I dont see as many men whining about not having a good relationships in the past.
Of course, girls have a freedom of choice and they do make very bad choices sometimes.
Tell me one more thing, if Girls paid so much attention to their love preferences in the past, they decided themselves that "Oh, This guy deserve my attention and Oh! I love him"
All of a sudden after six months or even a two months "Oh that guy was an ***hole! lol!"
Where does their caliber or ability go when they have to keep changing relationships and whine all over the social media? It tells much about their own character.
Anyway, Their behaviour, attitude and look towards life are the deciding factors that what kind of relationships or so called love you would get.
If we dont get the decent, loving and caring guy or girl just because, we ourselves dont deserve it until we learn to look harder in our own character and improve it.
Well, if you were Bill Gates' equivalent you could be the biggest, nerdiest guy in the world and women would flock to you. Truth is that life is just like middle school, and high school--the vast majority of attractive girls are attracted to the jocks, the cool guys, or the rich guys--that handful of young men. I call this the 80/20 rule, meaning, for instance, as two separate studies found, respectively: a) 80 of the women in a given dating pool will be dating the same 20 percent of men (leaving 80% of men with nothing); and b) if you ask women on the street to pick out 'attractive' men, the typical woman will choose only 20% of the men she sees as being 'good looking' (leaving 80% out in the cold). Women cannot help this because it is ages old--the fact is that almost any woman would prefer even sharing a man she finds attractive to having a man that she doesn't--and she doesn't find most men 'attractive'. I make a distinction between 'nice' men and 'good' men, and have found that women overwhelmingly avoid the nice men. Only the good men and the playboys / bad boys stand a chance, but of those two it's definitely the bad boys that get the lion's share of the p*ssy these days. The only thing I can say to you is that you realistically have to learn how to project a 'bad boy' persona--you're cool, you don't care, you have many choices, etc. Of course there are some very good women out there but we usually meet them when we are young & stupid and wish later that we had taken these opportunities when we had them--I certainly do. Later on, these girls are all gone--sad to say. If you are older than 30, you're stuck with the 'professional' women who are now 'ready' for marriage and feel they can afford to be ultra picky--and if you don't meet their qualifications list, it's 'so long Charlie'. Ironically, lots of US professional women complain, 'there are no good guy out there!' This is because feminism brainwashed them into believing that, 'when you are "ready" the right man will magically appear and you are entitled to have a man who only not fits all of your qualifications but also one who will change his life to meet your needs'. So they walk around with their clip boards and with all the finesse of a hog on ice--shockingly--scare away most 'eligible' men on the second date (when she feels 'empowered' to tell him that if he is not 'serious' then she is not interested). All in all, I'd say you're screwed short of a miracle and / or retraining yourself to become a 'pla
"A man's loyalty is tested when he has nothing. A woman's loyalty is tested when she has everything."
Rule #85 of The Ruling Passion
I think the best lesson for the (too many) women who think and act this way is to BE in charge, and have all the power and control that feminism preaches will bring happiness. I have seen this for many years amongst female university professors who 'get rid of all the old male white dead wood' (I am a professor), and become dept. chairs, project leaders, research heads, etc. Inevitably, they find out that 'finally having everything' means nothing more than lots of responsibility and is ultimately a very lonely place. I say let the idiot women take over, and that men should get a good education and job and strive to have 'enough'.
why do men who are good keep on picking women who don't treat them badly?
i think my new pet peeve is generalizations. not all women are like that. i've had bad experiences but i don't generalize. each bad experience has taught me something i needed to know and one day, i know, i will get what i need.
Time to wake up! To many women are like this. You may not be but 90% of them are! Out of 100 women (and I am not kidding) that I have met in the last few years all had that same trait. Fall for the horrible person and ignore the good one. Get offended by the generalizations but until women wake up it is not going to get better.
That's still your personal experience. 100% of the women you've met are still not 90% of all women.
You have to admit though, 90 women is not an insignificant number. Why can't women admit to being just like men when it comes to mating? Men go for body and age, women go for money and in more general higher socioeconomic status. Enough research has been carried out on modern married couples. When women are in relationships with males who earn less, the woman is very unsatisfied and it doesn't matter what his degree of involvement in household chores. Of course this doesn't mean all women. But in general women evolved to be a certain way, just like men.
If you meet 100 women and you can't get along with ANY of them, at what point to you consider the fact that YOU'RE the common denominator ? Men and women are still getting together and having relationships. Even the high divorce rate simply means people are less likely to remain in relationships where they're not happy---less social stigma attached. It doesn't necessarily mean people loved being married before.
Not all grenades explode, either. Would you be willing to pill the pin and find out which one is the dud?
Many men keep having the same experience, yet you women come up in here to have us believe it's some small minority. Somebody's *** is lying.
This is topic is for ugly men with overly inflated egos who have no respect for women and blame outside sources for their lack of luck with women. Hilarious! I've seen many men like this. Pretending to be "real,' men, upstanding and worthy of respect when they in turn have no respect for women. "A woman rejects me? The NERVE! it's not anything to do with me. Anyone presenting any reason that alludes to being my fault is WRONG. It's just these women, the lot of them, must be all crazy."
The simplest answer is usually the right one. These men are undesirable, not because they are "nice," obviously women fall passionately in love for more than just "nice." Even the most hideous woman at any given time have a couple of "nice," guys around them. It's as if HOW DARE a woman have PREFERENCES? If a man gives her the time of day and is very nice to her, she HAS to end up being attracted to him, or she's a fool, blind, no brain. Why in the world would a woman want an ******* like that? Hilarious. I read all this and still have faith there are good men out there, REAL good men, many of my male friends and my fiancee. Not pushovers but respect women as a gender. Then again they also aren't hideous, socially awkward men who pine for women they can never get, then end up blaming all women and anything and everything that does NOT pertain to themselves, for their lack of success. Ladies, keep rejecting these false "nice guys." They have no respect for you, you should not have your preferences. These men don't understand taking rejections GRACEFULLY. Great thing these types of men are alone, they ought to be alone forever until they learn how to truly respect women on the same scales as men. You got preferences? There's a reason why you keep pining for women you can't get? There's reasons why WOMEN have preferences as well. If you're so great as a man, why are so stupid to pine over women who do not want you? Get over yourselves. Sicken real women who have options and intelligent real good men out there. You give the men that are truly good men, a terrible reputation.
That's right somebody is ******* lying. The lot of the whiny "men," who are undesirable to women. Misogynistic idiots. Whine all you want, it only exposes women more to what type of people the lot of you "nice guys," are. Women should read this entire topic, everywhere to see the truth of these so called "nice guys," who do "so much," for them. The instance they are rejected, they stop caring or respecting these women and talk down to them, as if they were worse than dirt. Yeah, you "nice guys," are a REAL catch.
It's because the word women, girl is just a misconception. They are just prostitutes, and that is the word that should be coined for their type. They are just interested in the prospect you can offer. All men are possible clients for them. That is the reason why you see them treating you nicely at first, but when you don't spend on them or provide them benefits, they turn away from you.
It's quite opposite for males.. they only show interest in women when they are interested and don't troll them around or hurt their feelings without any reason.
Wow, you must have really have been hurt to have such a jaded view of women. I on the other hand know many wonderful women who have great personalities and treat you well. My ex was one. Our marriage never broke up because she was a shrew.
Another hideous, misogynistic ******* who deserves to be alone. Generalizing women as an entire gender. Cheer on ladies! We are doing the right things to these ********!
I think some of the problem is that the majority of men whom treat their wife's like Queens are introverted. Some of the most blissfully in love couples are both introverts. My marriage included. They love being with each other and doing simple things together. Like going on a Picnic, instead of Club hopping, holding hands on a trip to the Zoo, instead of attending a Beach Party, Talking and sharing each others secrets and desires. Snuggling under a blanket on a porch swing and watch it snow. I know several super nice guys that would make awesome partners, but they get passed by because they are shy and will never make the cover QG. Then I know some girls that keep running back to the @sshole whom treats them and their kid like Sh!t because he is such a good looking dude. I can't. Understand why a woman should want a 10 whom treats them like rubbish, over a 5 whom would treat them like gold.
low life loser women are everywhere nowadays that are creating the problem, and now more and more women are into other women which is certainly making it worse.
No it's not. Wake up this indicate your undesirability/low attractiveness factor. Stop lying to yourself. Any woman with half a brain who aren't 18th century submissive, automatically knows this to be the case when they encounter whiny men like you, who complain about and berate women they can never get.
So speaking up about BS that you had no part of isn't right is 'whiny'? I suppose I didn't get the memo.
Pay attention, men! You aren't supposed to even notice that women are the ones creating the problem, nor are you supposed to notice that you are being treated opunfairly. You are supposed to suffer in silence and be good to women who will do nothing for you. When North Korea/China'Russian/Venezuela invades the US, we are supposed to forget about how women have trated us and DIE for them! After all, they are GODDESSES! They are PURE and can DO NO WRONG!
there are just too many stupid women out there as it is, and will go with the loser men as well. many women are certainly not educated like they were years ago, making it worse for us straight good serious men that are looking to meet a good woman today. and to make matters worse, many women are the biggest cheaters today and that is the reason why the divorce rate is so out of control now.
there are just too many STUPID WOMEN out there now more than ever before, and they fit right in with them.
I never go for bad boys and douche bags. I know plenty of girls who do, most of whom either like attention or figure they don't deserve better. Then, I know a lot of guys who only go after girls who treat them badly. I have known guys like you who go after girls who are clearly only leading them on to get something, like compliments or gifts. They deserve a girl who likes them, but they only want that girl. Not all guys do that, but a lot do. Then I know guys who are nice at first, to win you, and then they change. People can, you know, lie and put on an act.
They love to complain
You are right though, I have seen many go for that bad boy type and even leave them just to go back to them again. They cannot help but go to the drama.
I believe alot of people are addicted to the drama types because it makes them feel alive or on the edge constantly. Not a good place to be.
Really as if life doesn't have enough drama as it is. LOL
Speaking from experience...Were not brightest crayon in the box...To stubborn to accept being treated good over bad
Speak for yourself, Sassyshel. Some women are NOT very bright, but some of us are. Not every man who thinks he's a "nice" guy actually IS one, so it's an easy excuse to say women don't want a nice guy, just because one doesn't want HIM.
Sounds like you are bitter because one of the nice guys you ignored found a woman and moved on, that why he's not a nice guy anymore, it's in nature for the female to desire the Alpha male,the female bird always want the male bird with the brightest feathers, the lioness always want the lion who roars the loudest but does the lease, and just like women, they always want the Shiney dressed pretty boy with good talk game and no job or car, and all a woman will tell a good working man is how he doesn't spend enough time with her because he works too much,now how does that make any sense
Yep. I feel the same way bijoux, seems like an ignorant redneck fest here back before women's suffrage. It's ALL about what the man wants. God forbid a woman has a preference, being nice is not the sole, prerequisite to wanting to be with a man. These men aren't nice any way. Bitter and fake and turn around calling youbitter? Hilarious! It's sad to see how many utterly ignorant women here agreeing with these misogynistic men. There are stupid women here but not the way these men indicate. The women blind to how they live in a society that is patriarchal to them even when it comes to unrequited love, are stupid. Makes me pretty sad. These women don't even seem to see the inequality to what these men are saying. These men here are saying if a woman dares have a preference that is not selecting HIM, she has/is: mental disorders, stupid etc. etc. all sorts of berating verbs. Why would these women sympathize with men like these? Insanity. These men think they are entitled to ANY woman they put effort in pursuing if they don't get returns, they put the woman or in this case, her entire gender across the board down. These aren't men, they're f****** babies. I'm actually more surprised at the ignorant women than the men here.
Exactly right, Lufysb. :))
Because they weren't loved as children and they're looking to fix what's wrong with themselves by going for someone who seems to see that flaw. They think there is a flaw there.
That is not my damn problem.
Huh. I just clicked on your user name and read one of your posts. You're overweight and self professed "ugly." This truly backs up my thoughts. Men like you are pretty much whiny, unattractive bitter men. You said in your post you want "pretty women," so why would you think women don't want "pretty men," just NICE? LOL Total and complete male privilege issues. Funny thing is if you're not even average in looks, why would you think you should be entitled to an above average, pretty woman, who in turn should overlook your physical unattractiveness, because you're kind? You think better looking guys can't be kind to the same woman? You're in complete and utter self denial. Just lose weight and fix your looks and get over this whiny mess. I will never post here again so don't reply in any manner that you may think I'll read.
Not to worry, it is not you it is just the way this culture is today. Women think if they have all the material things in life it will make them happy but that is a big load of crap. We have television, movies, women's magazines, the crap on the internet, false fantasy romance books that brain wash women and make them believe that the real men are losers. They all want the no good for nothing because he has no power. Men that are successful, have money and power and women want control over everything now. Women want to be the boss and control everything. Losers are wimps and get into the fetal position when a control freak woman is giving out her orders. That is what they want a wimpy no good for nothing loser. They pretty much want a female with a working penis. The best thing guys like us can do is hope some day women wake up and realize that interacting with losers does not nothing but destroy their lives but women are hard headed and always think they have no faults what so ever so we may have to wait until they make female robots to replace the failed
females on this culture.
Exactly. One is Jackie Brinson. She has an absent, ***** of a father (greg brinson), and a controlling, abusive, manipulating mother. Her entire fam is all about materialistic things and being popular and better than everyone else. It all boils down to their own issues. Low-self esteems and the absence of love. I'm bringing these "people" out into the open so that all can avoid them in the future. Jackie (my ex) was all a pathological liar and felt that she deserved to be treated like a princess 24/7. That she had NO flaws and that she ran the show. All because her mother filled her head with this garbage due to her neglecting, absent father. And my neglecting I mean spent NO time with his two daughters as they grew up and treated their mother like s***. People who grew up like this must be strong enough to realize their situation and get out of it. Otherwise they'll have a life of hell.
This question has certainly brought out some ugly attitudes toward women. And yet the answer is the same as if the question were reversed: Why do men turn away from good women, who care for and love them, and seek women who treat them terribly? Actually, there are a couple of possible answers:
1. Because some people--both women and men--enjoy the drama that's par for the course with troubled partners. They'll often deny that, but indeed they can't maintain their interest in a relationship without it.
2. Everyone is a mixed bag. Few people are irredeemable (though they do exist). Many "bad boys" and "bad girls" have other traits that are very attractive. These may include confidence, charm, intelligence, charisma, athleticism, good sense of humor, adventurous spirit, and so on. Generally, it's these traits that women (and men) become attracted to early on. They get drawn into the relationship and develop deep feelings for the other person. By the time they find out that their partner is also dishonest, unfaithful, manipulative, etc., they're already invested in the relationship. It's easy for outsiders to see this but harder for the person who's blinded by love.
Seriously, the female bashing on this thread is horrible and unwarranted. Women are badly hurt by men just as often as men are hurt by women.
However, my specific advice to the OP (if he's still even reading) is this:
A woman will generally know within the first few meetings if she's interested in you as a romantic partner, just as you will often know within the first few meetings if you are interested in her. There *are* couples who start off as friends first, but often there was always a mutual attraction there, and they just didn't act on it right away. If you don't find that a woman is interested in you as a potential romantic partner early on, then she probably sees you as a friend. It's not likely you're going to be able to change that, no matter how nice you are. She's either attracted to you in that way or she isn't, and her reasons could be anything from your physical appearance to personality traits she doesn't like to just the sense that you two don't "click" in the way she wants in a partner.
If you're not okay with being just friends with such a woman, then don't be her friend. The worst thing you can do is pretend to be her friend just because you hope she'll want to be your girlfriend or lover some day. It's not fair to either of you.
If none of the women you meet are interested in you ever, then consider counseling to help you find out if there's something you need to change about your attitude or social skills to make you more attractive as a partner. It could be that you *think* you'd make a great partner, but women are seeing something you don't that turns them away.
Just hearing this response verifies why women will be draw to a man like you. Generalizing and stereotyping women as an entire gender and the try to present it as fact. Why on earth would a any woman want a misogynistic idiot like yourself?
You not being able to be with the women you pursue is a good thing. God forbid any woman ends up with a man that thinks this way of her entire gender, "mental issues that prevent them from thinking logically."
You sound like a whiny child who, instead of looking within yourself to find why you're rejected, you say ludicrous things like generalizing an entire gender in order to "save face," and soothe your bruised ego.
Men like you absolutely deserve to be alone. No woman should have to endure a crazy headcase like yourself. It's such a male privilege issue - I can't have this woman so I will villify her entire gender, there MUST be something wrong with her.
It's no wonder you have no luck with the women you pursue, they're obviously smart enough to see through that misogynistic bullshit, which I'm sure you try to disguise when pursuing them. Insincere, misogynistic and egotistical.....
Women are self-centered. Period. They want all their needs met and they don't want to work for ANYTHING. You are the perfect example of what this blog entry is all about. A disgruntled, self-loathing, self-centered, lazy little girl who thinks that women are above men. You feminists have no say in anything. period.
*will not be drawn, typo.
It is so frustrating. Alot of ladies love the bad boys and ignore men like me who they find boring because I am not "a Bad " who you can't trust but adds excitement. They they tell you men are all lairs and cheaters because that is the kind of guy they like to associate with. It is like a lady saying all men are bank robbers, because that is the kind they always seem to be attracted too and never see the really good men out there.
Grow up, this is how life is, it is not fair. Why go and generalize women, in any way? It only makes all men appear to be whiny losers to women. The lot who are in unrequited love statues. Women like real men and all this blaming and whining is certainly not a mark of a real man.
Women are not sex/love machines where you continuously feed enough nice coins in to get the sex/love back.
They either are attracted to you or they aren't.
Wow, this is a fascinating exchange. So much misunderstanding and pain. I could flip flop this whole thing - most women I know would say the similar things about the men in their lives. My .02: we all re-create and re-live our painful subconscious definitions of love, ba
Most women I know, despite the sexual revolution, have been trained to set themselves aside to serve others' needs/expectations. It's deeply burned into the psyche from those key formative years. The women often re-create this feeling of having to stifle their needs by being with a man who demands that he be the center of everything, one way or another.
I've often witnessed men, on the other hand, who are deeply entrenched in protecting their independence and stifling their feelings, and who abandon women who they become close to, out of a need to avoid intimacy. Especially if the woman becomes too available or giving, which leaves the men uninspired because they need the chase. Or, the men choose women who are incapable of true intimacy, or choose women who will be patient enough to deal with putting him in the center, putting herself aside.
The only solution is to try to work past childhood pain to break patterns that appear in adulthood, either with the current romantic interest or alone. That, in my view, is the actual beautiful spiritual journey of true partnership. The tricky part - attractions don't always line up with who is "good" for you, on the surface. It usually lines up with the stuff you have to work through. And in that sense, every attraction is a gift to be learned from.
the women today are totally different than the women of years ago, when they really were committed to their men and made their marriage work. and many of us men were very faithful as well, and us men today are certainly in the same boat as you are.
Because they meet men like some of these posters who dislike and despise women, and take it out on all of us. These are not "good" men, some feel a sense of entitlement; they want a woman, and if she doesn't respond in the way they want, she's a b*tch who "doesn't appreciate a good man". And there ARE just enough idiot women out there who believe a "real man" (whatever the hell that is) is supposed to kick her behind. We certainly don't all feel that way.
First off, we are speaking about how we feel. We are keenly aware that there are idiot women out there. That is why we are here. It isn't women themselves we dislike and despise, but your ATTITUDES and JUSTIFICATIONS for treating good men like they don't exist and opening your legs for felons, druggies and losers.
Lady, we may be hurt and jaded, but we ain't ******' crazy. We see this **** every ******* day.
Would you take up for men if women were talking bad about them? I doubt it. Secondly, you women like to pull this 'we stick together' **** when things are going good for you, but when they go bad, have the nerve to want to be treated as individuals.
Entitlement. I wanna puke every time I see that word. Simply wanting the same effort out of women what we put into them isn't entitlement. Who teaches this **** anyway? If we felt 'entitled' to women, we wouldn't even bother with this site; we would just go out and take what we want by force, God forbid **** reaches that point.
You don't know ME, and you clearly haven't read my posts. I'm just as likely to stick up for men---and HAVE----when moronic women are on here talking about "real men" needing to be "tough" instead of expressing their feelings. And for the record, I'VE never been with a druggie, felon OR loser, for that matter. Plenty of us have held out for the "nice" guys, and watched while some pursued the exciting, pretty female equivalents of the druggie, feloness, loser. Then watched them come back from hell with crap for the "nice" girls who sat home by the phone, having had nothing to do with these guys' choices. I've been lucky, overall, I've treated men well and been treated well by them. And one main reason is that I avoid angry, bitter men like the plague. You fellows terrify me, and I don't need the toxicity. I'm not bringing my baggage, and I don't want to carry anyone else's, sorry.
Please reread what I said, I just got through saying I've argued with OTHER women who believe "real men" don't have feelings. I want men to have feelings, and my male friends know they can trust me with their hearts. Men have cried in my arms because of some of the things you describe. But I don't hurt guys, and I don't pursue losers, nor do I stick around with anyone who would mistreat me. Men who are so angry at ALL women that they're bitter and vicious frighten me, and I avoid them at all costs. The women who don't, fall into two categories: the ones who think they can "fix" them (and often end up being a punching bag because of what some other woman did), and those women who find angry men "exciting".
there are just too many low life loser women out there today than ever before, especially when they go after the loser men as well. then again, losers will attract losers.
Personally, I think most women prefer to be abused and mistreated. I cannot even begin to count how many I have seen in the past 20 years who will simply refuse to even acknowledge a man who shows any amount of kindness, decency, or any other positive trait.
But bring in the "bad boy" and every single one will throw themselves at him in an instant.