It could be you are just stupid that way or your self esteem has reached zero...
Its sounds, Tina, like you have masochistic tendencies. It is alright to explore these feelings with an experienced Dom who realizes this is a turn on for you and who can do it without hurting you. It is NOT okay to allow yourself to be abused. There is a difference. Blows to the head can be dangerous, even fatal. You need to moderate your feelings and share them with someone who can help you deal with the constructively.
I couldn't be attracted to someone who was violent towards me. I couldn't be attracted to someone who could be set off easily. Just wouldn't be worth my while to be involved with someone with whom I had to walk on eggshells.
..."to each his/her own"..
oo yes baby.. thts BDSM... u love to play hard n rough... u need a stud to satisfy u....with his strong **** n strong musceles
and dead brain.
Perhaps you are a masochist?
I think its ok but you have to be in TOTAL control of this. The fact that it turns you on during sex means that it could be a new experience that you could explore. I suggest that its your call on HOW, WHEN AND THE FORCE APPLIED until you explore this experience and what it does to you then you will eventually know what you want or what works with you. I also think that this should be with one you trust as some guys would get the wrong idea and hurt you. I don't think it should lead to any thing heavy as for me that is violent. But also try and find out what makes it feel wrong sometime as you say. Is it that it happens with out your will or you sense that this person your with could probably hurt you if you let it continue or is it uncalled for at that time as their is always a time for everything. I hope all goes well but it should almost be your call on everything and not abuse!!!!!
you have zero self respect
I tend to agree with Orion on this one.
:/ well... i feel ya...maybe, it hurts so, we learn to embrace it? maybe we learn to crave the abuse... im sorry...