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He doesn't say I'm ugly or fat, nothing that blatant. Just things like my shoes look ugly even though I've worn them fifty times before and nothing rude was said. Or he will randomly act like me going out of my way for him is a joke. If I don't do the dishes exactly when he wants he will say things like "you don't do anything else with your day, ill just pay a maid to do it". And he will take pictures of dirty dishes or anything I don't clean ect. It's annoying and nuts! I'm not tooting my own horn, I fell in love for his personality and he's not ugly but I am without a doubt more attractive, I think that's why he insults my outfits or appearance. I work part time and make just as much money as him, yet he acts like I do nothing. He's so sweet and shy 99% of the time then he just says rude shtt randomly and degrades me as a woman. Never straight up calls me a name but he babbles on obviously trying to make a point without saying the exact words. Why would he do this?
OXoxoXoxoXO OXoxoXoxoXO 18-21, F 15 Answers Jul 6, 2013 in Struggles

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What your boyfriend is secretly saying, even though he doesn't realize he's saying it is, "Please go and cheat on me. I deserve it."

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If thats even remotely you in the AVI... he knows your attractive and is worried that your going to find better... by putting you down a little he hopes that you believe your in the same league as him. Obviously he has self esteem issues. It isn't right what he's doing...

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That reminds me of the last guy I was involved with...Things like, "I don't like your luggage." Or, "I don't think I'd like your mom." The worst was "You like to be the center of attention"- which I knew wasn't true. He also could be sweet and pay stellar compliments......but now and then- zing!

I'm not sure if that's the same as with your fellow. I felt like he was trying to keep me off balance somehow. Like he didn't really want me to be secure in the relationship. Is that the sense you get?

I'm still not sure why, so I guess I can't make a very good guess about why your fellow would do such a thing. I think I'd end up asking him, point blank. If he listened and tried to be aware of it all, then that's one thing. But if he gets angry and defensive, then I'd take it more to heart.

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Probably to compensate for his own lack of self esteem. Move-on! People like him DO NOT change.

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I know this is easier said than done, but you shouldn't settle for someone like that. This answer and solution is simple to a situation that's blinded by emotion..

My last bf called me fat and other things too..I tried to see if he would still change but he didn't so in less than a year I ended it.

I may not be attractive but i didn't deserve that treatment either.

And you may be right, he might just be making you feel less than you are to keep you..very unhealthy tactic..so end it..

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He has low self esteem and by putting you down he feels better about himself, at least on a subconscious level. It doesn't bode well for your relationship.

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he's insecure about something most likely.

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Yeah I think he's probably a little insecure and shows it by sometimes criticizing you.

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What's funny? Insulting her?

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Yeah that makes sense actually. I just feel bad for her in this situation :/

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