It's hard because it's part of their abuse to make it hard to leave them. Whether making you feel guilty or cutting you off from friends and family or threats or whatever, you can't stay in that mindset.
Maybe your guilty for enabling such behaviours for so long and being partner to such dysfunction??...<br />
Now you can feel good about leaving,..since life is short and every now and then we progress to a next stage...<br />
You can learn about te things you have been putting off,..and he can too.....<br />
Otherwise you may as well stay and supply him with even stronger alcohol...Just stay out of arms reach,..and wait for the inevitable..
Dear Lady, get out while the getting is good. the******* might recover then you will be back to the old ways.
Maybe because admitting or just realizing that several years of life were needlessly wasted ,is just too devastating to deal with and accept. Sorry but can't think of a kind way to put it.