Because it's a huge responsibilty and one they know they can hardly escape once the child is born.
Not having kids does not mean one doesn't like them.
People can have fulfilling lives without raising a family, and people involved in the welfare of humankind are not selfish or materialistic. Being pregnant means a lot of pain and discomfort, it's very normal not to enjoy it, in spite of all the nice pictures the media will convey.
Not everyone marries either, whatever their sexual preferences and not every man wants to be a father.
A lesbian can have kids and a so-called straight woman can not have kids. And mostly whatever they are called the experience is the same, the pain is the same, the responsibility is the same.
You don't seem to understand-you can be straight and married and not have kids (like my sister and her husband).
Some people aren't maternal , me being one of them . I love my kids to death but being a mother didn't come naturally and my siblings feel the same . We love the kids in our family greatly but as a rule are not fond of kids in general . I'm actually surprised we have 6 kids between us . I wouldn't change it for the world but I also think we each had a boy and a girl for a reason .
I think there is nothing wrong with admitting that kids are not your thing ,
Why shouldn't they?
Why should it be puzzling - either you want children or you don't. I have never wanted them - (I am male BTW) though it wasn't till my love-life was over that I realised I could not have become a father anyway.
There's a lot of peer / family / society pressure to procreate, quite apart from our natural instincts as animals to do so. For we ARE animals - sentient, living organisms - controlled by instincts albeit with intellectual and emotional powers some orders of magnitude higher than our nearest primate relatives; those powers give us the ability to control our instincts to a large extent.
We are also highly individual animals thanks to that brain-power, so it's not surprising that we have differing levels of, or responses to, the urge to breed.
As others say, pregnancy is deeply unpleasant, delivery horrible and being a parent is long-term heavy social and financial commitment - and reproduction is the one bodily function that is voluntary thanks to our ability to control its drive; probably uniquely among all animals.
Not at all. We are living creatures, but not "just any", as you say, thanks to our intellectual, emotional and speech abilities being far ahead of any other creature - but we are still biological "products".
That's why most people have the urges they do; but our individuality means both that not all of us share those urges; and that we can choose.
I regard the accusation of seeing people as "experimental objects" as rather low.
In no way have I made any such statement, or implied that I hold any such unpleasant idea, Being interested in how people act and react is one thing; regarding them as merely impersonal test-pieces in a laboratory is quite another & I would dream of doing any such thing.
And I say that as a willing subject of a huge statistical survey called the "English Longitudinal Study of Ageing" - we are interviewed at 5-yearly intervals. Yes, I'm part of a study - but I am not a laboratory sample and I do not feel like one.
gosh! i love your answer...............just love the answer...its so true
I find it irritating that you seem to think only the homosexuals don't want kids. I'm very straight and I have no children, and don't want any. There are multiple reasons for this-not the least of which is overpopulation. My selfish reason-I'm not doing that to my body! The real and right reason: kids are an incredible responsibility. I think the most un-selfish thing I can do is not have any babies.
That annoys me, too. Sexual orientation has nothing to do with wanting or not wanting children.
I'm hetero, married, and never wanted and never had children. I had zero maternal yearnings, and would have been unwilling to make the sacrifices in terms of freedom, time, and money that being a parent requires. It just wasn't what I wanted to do with my life. Feeling that way, I wouldn't have been a good parent.
It's not a matter of "liking". I've chosen against reproduction for serious reasons because I have a brain and I think.
Just because your a woman and you have the tools to have kids don't mean you have to use that tool or like kids. Kids are people some of them are likable and some of them aren't. I don't like kids I just don't the same reason some people just do it's hard to explain. Pregnancy isn't magic. Every woman I know who went through it complains it uncomfortable and nasty to some woman something is inside you living off you. Everyone doesn't have or want children parental love isn't universal some want to experience it others don't. God didn't intend every woman to experience it. Some are barren some just don't have any urge. That urge people talk so much about it varies for each person. Right now I don't feel any urge for kids. If you don't have the instinct and urge so many people seem to think everyone has you won't want kids. That instinct to procreate is what makes people have kids if they didn't have it no one would want or have them. I dontwant kids because I don't need them. Everyone doesn't need a child they want them. Just remember everything on earth has to be balance. Some woman want them and some don't. I don't like young child nor do I want kids. That lifetime commitment to one person isn't appealing to me I rather travel the world and help thousands of people that my dreams and purpose.
Thank you that's all people who don't want kids want to be respected and left alone. We don't expect people to understand but we don't need them judging us. The same way if you decide to have kids I would never judge anyone for their choice I'm an aunt to four kids. And that's as close I'm getting to any.
When I say I dislike kids I mean their behavior ad that particular phase I like babies and kids above 8
Thanks a lot-NOT!!! THAT makes me NOT want kids b/c u said how it's uncomfortable & gross for something to be living inside u!! I WANT kids,...I just DON'T want the pregnancy part!! :(
Everyone's on their own journey. For some, that journey doesn't include kids. Kids ruin a woman's body, they're lots of work (that most women do the majority of), it's thankless work and changes every aspect of your life. It's nothing like the fantasy sold in the movies. It's hard, and takes its toll on the woman, the man, the relationship, their finances and their life.
pregnancy aversion young female of the species....
next thing you know, they are settled and want to breed !
and are able to care for the young they birth. science innit?
My thought is that some people have had bad experiences with poorly raised children, and don't realize how well children can be raised. There are many other factors as well. I have 3 living children and I love being a mom, but I didn't feel that way before getting married. Society and my family upbringing did not endear me to large families, and I had a selfish mindset that was wrong. I have learned what a blessing children can be, and how having children teaches us as parents. Now I am older and for health and financial reasons fear having any more children. Seriously, with my heart problems it would probably kill me. I have also had 3 miscarriages and years of infertility. So I know what it is like on both sides of the issue. The hard thing now is deciding if I should do something to permanently prevent it at the age of 42. I don't like messing with it, and many of my friends have very large families and I am afraid they wouldn't be very understanding.
Because they will get fat & it's so hard to get fit again ! Btw it hurts so freaking much !
Its not that simple, and until you have pushed an awkwardly shaped object the size of a large football out of your unmentionables after having lugged it around in your abdomen for nine months song side sickness, pain, and the urge to burn the world alive because your hormones are playing keep away with your sanity...then we'll have a lovely chat over lunch and a movie.
I've never wanted kids or to be pregnant and it's not because I don't like them, it's just that I never wanted that kind of responsibility and I wouldn't want to even chance wrecking my body.
Because everyone is different.
I'm only 6 weeks pregnant and even though I'm excited, I'm puking all the time and my nose is all blocked up. I certainly hope it stops soon.
Why? Because being a mother isn't for the faint of heart.
This question makes me wonder about you the questioner. Have you did your research about pregnancy and rearing kids? it is no walk in the park. Yes a lot of people like kids and want them but that doesn't make it easy.
Pregnancy is not like a carnival. It is not all fun and games like the media portrays it. Its a lot of pain, takes a toll on the body, and screws it up. Do your research. Raising kids is not an easy either. They take up time, energy, and it cost money. AND, in most cases women get stuck doing all the rearing. Men most of the time dont do much. I know this because i ve seen it in people I know, with my family, and my dad and stepdad. And then some men don't do crap around the house, and leave all of it to their wives to deal with. Does this sound familiar?
Some of us women have dreams of leaving a mark on this world. We want to change it all for the better of us all, help those in need, even kids who don't have much living on the streets. We cant do all these things if we are too busy raising children.
Aren't there enough children in the world that need homes? why bring in more? Kids are not pets, novelties, or toys, -they are people with little experience on earth. A lot of people forget this they talk about wanting and having children.
Though men and women are of the flesh as animals, do we have to be mindless like animals and feel the need to procreate? We are individuals with so much to offer, and should not feel obligated to these animal instincts. There is more to life than to just getting married and having kids then grandkids.
Personally, I do want a child. NO more than two. This would not happen anytime soon because I am not ready for the responsibilty and refuse to have a child solo.
The term, a lot which I used, does not include everyone. So, good for you if you are not one of those parents.
And btw, I love animals very much so, that does not make it dispicable as you may say. Think of one extreme case: octo mom. Or the Dugars
Never mind children. A few full-stops would come in handy in that lot! :-)
Seriously though, why did you think anyone would imagine being a parent was like looking after a puppy? No-one has said it is! I think you've misunderstood the basic natural principle that inspired the original question - that of the instinct to have children being absent in some people (of both sexes, not just women). We humans can choose; other animals can't, because they don't have anything like our range and sublety of intellect and emotions. The instinct is the same though.
If I understand you correctly, your son suffers from an illness that will end his life early, and for that you have my deepest sympathy. No-one can say "why", all you can do is celebrate each day you do have with him.
Everyone is different.
I have never been a "kid" person and never had to desire to have any. The birthing film they showed us in junior high made me queazy and I still do not enjoy birthing scenes on tv or movies. I get that it is the miracle of life but it grosses me out. It has nothing to do, for me personally, with being career driven or materialistic, but I am perfectly happy being "Mom" to my beautiful dog/fur son!
I can't stand kids. I love my neice and nephew and all but I could never live with them. I'd go nuts haha I refuse to ever have them. They're cute n all when they're not yours but if I have my own, I'd need a live-in nanny cause I don't think I'd be a good mom.
For the same reasons some men don't live children or procreation. Regardless of gender, some people just don't like children/having children. Such is one facet of the variety of mankind.
No-one but you is talking about homosexuality here.
...I wasn't referring to homosexuals. Most of us actually DO want to have children. I'm talking about all people. Heterosexual men and women often do not want or like children.
There's not one reason. Individualism, career, pleasure or materialism could all provide some explanation for some women.