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Why won't she wear her wedding ring?

I caught my wife in two online relationships, after the second one, I filed for divorce. About six months ago she took her rings off and refuses to put them back on, despite the fact that right now we are trying to make things work. But now, when 'thoughtfulness', 'understanding' and 'respect for our marriage' is needed most, she refuses to put it on, simply because it is made of gold. (That's the reason she gave me) So, she bought a new one made of silver. It seems to diminish the meaning of what 'our' rings meant. It seems to me that her feelings about how it looks means more to her than what it means. Especially considering how she wore those rings for 6 ½ years, through the worst of times, and never took them off. I'll never understand how she has justified her decision. To me, the meaning has been lost and I am made to compromise, when in reality the only thing that has been compromised is the meaning of the rings that we placed on each other's fingers when we said, 'I do'.

Posted 1 month ago

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kessie

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well I have been married 22 years and haven't worn any rings for at least 12 years.

I got eczema under my ring and took it off. It cleared up so I put rings on again. It came back and I took them off never to be put back on again. They used to get in the way anyway catching on stuff.

I don't wear any jewelry at all in fact, use my mobile phone for a watch.

Rings don't make the marriage any more or less committed. Trust is more important than rings.

I tell my husband I don't wear them as I am looking to upgrade on him so want eligible men to think I am available. (joking)

Posted 1 month ago

Other 8 Answers to Why won't she wear her wedding ring?

MsAnthropy	Posted Oct 16th, 2009 at 6:11AM But, she DOES wear a ring, correct? I think you are overreacting, and even if she is lying about her reason to wear the original ring, I think it is justified. You are both on your second go-round now. In her view, this new start may call for new promises and new jewelery. Rated: +2Vote for this!
Charro	Posted Oct 16th, 2009 at 6:25AM Perhaps she feels she has betrayed the true meaning of the ring by participating in two affairs whilst married to you. As a result, she may feel uncomfortable wearing it and may not feel comfortable to wear it again, at least until she is able to forgive herself and once again feel worthy of wearing it. I suggest you give her time, or a new ring as a symbol of a new start and a new commitment. Rated: +2Vote for this!
londongothgirl	Posted Oct 16th, 2009 at 6:10AM I think your kind of overeacting. I don't wear my wedding ring as it's too big and I don't really like it. My husban doesn't wear his often either. The ring doesn't make the marriage. She may not want to wear it as it might be a symbol to her of the problems your marriage had. She might not be ready to wear it again. Or also very likely the gold gives her a reaction, I know it does to me so I only wear silver, and that's all. Rated: +2Vote for this!
waltzwithme	Posted Oct 16th, 2009 at 8:24AM If she is wearing a wedding ring and wanted a silver one instead of yellow gold, I don't see a problem and I don't think it diminishes anything. Yellow gold is not as popular currently and she's wearing a wedding ring so I don't see a problem. Rated: +1Vote for this!
rusted	Posted Oct 16th, 2009 at 10:00AM I haven't worn mine in years. What's in a person's heart is more important that what's on the finger. I hope you two are getting counseling or something for your marriage. Rated: +1Vote for this!
avalonleppard	Posted Oct 16th, 2009 at 5:14AM I agree with you completely.....wearing it is a sign of devotion, I Rated: +1Vote for this!
porkchopsandwich	Posted Oct 16th, 2009 at 12:04PM I never wore my ring because I never actually loved my husband. Rated: +1Vote for this!
amigos	Posted Oct 16th, 2009 at 1:05PM The key issue is that of trust. If she hadn't been on online relationships, had you not filed for divorce, perhaps the change of rings might not seem such a big deal to you. Trust takes a very long time to build but a very short time to destroy & if only one party is trying to restore that trust, conflicts & suspicions are sure to arise. You need to know & be convinced if she wants to make this work as much as you do, & once that's cleared, perhaps the path ahead might be clearer, just my 2 cents worth. Rated: +1Vote for this!

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