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Why would he treat me this way?

So although I hav ebeen going through a lot lately, the one thing that usually keeps me going is thinking back to times when I was happy. I think many people can relate to that. I dated this one guy when I was 15, after being friends with him since I was 11. There was no other guy who had made me feel so much, even though it sounds corny because at 11 its hard to tell. We broke up & remained really close. He still told me I was beautiful not too long ago. I told him I still cared, even though he was now engaged. He sent me a sweet message back saying he'd always care about me and at times felt an attachment to me even though he was with her. He said hed always be there for me in rough times or to talk and confided that he wished it could have gone better with us. Weeks later I saw them. He came up to me and she followed so he turned around. Now I am off his facebook friends & when I asked why. He said "move on"...but we were fine? Why he is abandoning a great friend?

Posted 5 months ago

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'So although I hav ebeen going through a lot lately, the one thing that usually keeps me going is thinking back to times when I was happy.' This is how you started your question. You have admitted that the time you spent with your ex was a happy time in your past. Two points from that. it is in your past, leave it there. For his sake, for your sake & for his finance sake. There is a reason you have both moved on, and that your relationship didn't work. Our first loves stay in our hearts forever but that doesn't mean that they are meant to be our lasts. He has committed himself to marrying another woman. He loves her. You have to let him be. And if to do that is to let you go then let him.

Everyone who said his finance probably put her "nose" in is right, but can you blame her!? I would to, and i think most women would.

Second point: you say you recall on these happy memories to get you through hard times, there is no reason to stop doing that. You will always have these happy memories to hold onto, and to remember the way he has made you feel. No one can take that from you.

What i suggest now is walk away, don't beat this until there is nothing left there. You have your memories, you have that wonderful feeling he puts into your heart, as does he. something the two of you will always share. But let him be happy, and allow yourself to find happiness as well. It may be hard, but he is not a bad person for doing what he is doing. Remember, there is a reason you love him.

Posted 5 months ago

Other 9 Answers to Why would he treat me this way?

maddieaz	Posted Jun 1st, 2009 at 4:58AM Put yourself in his fiancees shoes, would you want something like this to be happening with an ex girlfriend if you were engaged to be married to this man? Let him get on with his life, what you had was a childhood crush. Rated: +3Vote for this!
tat2doc	Posted May 31st, 2009 at 7:29PM Because he still has feelings for you and has to play the part of the one girl man now. I think some, or all of his heart is still with you but he has to be the "good husband" now and try to put his past behind him. (key words being "for now") My ex g/f just got married and won't answer any of my friend requests on Face Book. I can only assume it's for the same reasons. Either she hates me that much, or doesn't trust herself with her feelings. Back in 94 when I was getting married for the second time, an old flame called me out of the blue after 10 years saying she wanted to get back together and all that jazz. It just happened to be my wedding day by coincidence. I ended up telling her that I was getting married in 10 minutes and I never heard from her again. But chances are good that if she'd have shown up in person, things would have possibly went differently. Rated: +2Vote for this!
AmbienCR	Posted May 31st, 2009 at 11:11PM There really is no such thing as friendship between a man and a woman. Men often say one thing but think and do another. I encourage you to pursue other relationship options. He made his choice. Rated: +2Vote for this!
Candimarie91	Posted May 31st, 2009 at 11:17PM I think he still has feelings for you since u guys knew each other a long time. You guys grew together. And maybe he has a guilt that he needs to put past issues left in the past. when u guys talked he probably thought he had feelings but wen it came down to seeing you he probably realized that you and him cannot be together, or that he cannot be friends it would distract him from his fiance. Like people said he probably realized he stil had feelings for u. And for him to put them in the past is for him to tell you to move on. being friends with him is only causing him to be stuck because he's gona have to choose b/t u or her. And he is engaged so he's trying to live in the present. Truth is he probably does and will always care about u. Its just the matter of the fact that he realized u guys cant be friends he has a new woman, sparks cud be reunited and he cud end up hurting his fiance. And that would cause a lot of drama. I'd just move on I know with my ex I wanted 2 be his friend but realized we cannot be friends because we do and say things to make each other jealous and he has another girl already so yeah. you'll be happier if you let the past be the past. I know it sucks but ull get over it. Rated: +1Vote for this!
TheRealWoman	Posted May 31st, 2009 at 6:42PM Sounds like the fiancee stuck her nose in... sorry sweetie. Rated: +1Vote for this!
MISTRESSROXY	Posted May 31st, 2009 at 7:28PM Because a family has to come first. You might be a problem in his relationship. Move on and find a man of your own. Rated: +1Vote for this!
PeachyDiamond	Posted May 31st, 2009 at 7:55PM i am an x,as much as it hurts, and as cold as it sounds, i had to completely stop all contact, no replies to anything, no calls no txt, no email, as much as i wanted to stay friends it really isnt possible to stay friends when they're still hung up and cant move on, i didnt take this initiative on impulse, its been going on for over a year now, and has made it almost impossible for me to start a new relationship, its a choice for u, dont choose to b treated this way, u both need to move on..i just checked your profile, your still young, live your life instead of regretting it..good luck Rated: +1Vote for this!
Duckgirl	Posted Jun 1st, 2009 at 5:00AM I think you were being honest with him. Its kind of hard to say but at that moment and time it was probably wrong for you to do that. You stirred yours and his old flame up. He had already picked his future. Rated: +1Vote for this!
socialfail	Posted Jun 2nd, 2009 at 12:02AM Maybe he was just trying to hook up one last time before he got married, his fiance being as keen and observant as women are probably picked up on this and set him straight. Rated: +1Vote for this!

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