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BritneyBrit BritneyBrit 22-25, F 11 Answers Jan 3 in Community

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I'd make myself absent everytime he does that. Only spend time with him when he's not rude even if it means you hardly ever spend time with him. As soon as he starts just say "well I'm out of here now Dad, I'll catch up with you later when you're in a better mood. Bye." It's called positive reinforcement - works with children and even dogs.

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thank you. i actually did this, I live with him so its harder to hide all the time. but i will keep doing this.

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Keep it up, you're a brave girl. I know it's hard when you live in the same house, but just keep finding things to do away from him. My daughter did that with her father and had a fair bit of success. She got at least a bit of decent 'fathering' out of him before he died 8 yrs ago. (*he was an alcoholic and impossible to live with).

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Some men like to lower our self-esteem as a means of controlling us.

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Very true. If they can't 'win' on an equal footing they try to cut down 'the opposition'.

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Because he is abusive. When you love something you try to build it up not break it down.

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because he is an inconsiderate bonehead

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Just curious Brit, are you currently dating? This is related to your question, not me being creepy.

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no I'm not. Why ?

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Sometimes dad's act like that when daughters are dating a boy that represents a threat to his alpha male status. It's silly but sometimes the dad will lash out at the daughter (more passive aggressive) or at the other male himself (this is what you usually see in sitcoms and movies).

I could see this behavior too if you were approaching some milestone, new big job, moving out etc. something that indicates you are growing up and no longer need him.

Looking at your profile pic, you are a pretty gal. (Now I AM being a little creepy, lol). I would try to ignore his pokes and jabs at your appearance. I know that's easier said than done when it's your father.

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I see what you mean. Thanks

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Nothing wrong with you, what would he say?

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cause you're his pride and joy

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I know that feel. Brush it off, you're beautiful.

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