I've asked other suspecting questions here and got some good response so I'll continue with another. My wife has been acting a bit strange lately. Making me suspicious, she has been on the computer a lot lately, and although I've tried to keylog her computer, my son always sees it, tells her about it, and I end up taking it off saying it's just spyware. Anyway, she always goes to the store or mall alone and makes excuses why she has to go. Even though we just got back from numerous stores so I ask her, why didn't you ask to go to that specific store when we we're out, or get that item when we we're out? I don't know, just seems strange. Oh, and on another occasion, she got up early Sunday, said she needed to beat everyone else to the local self-serve carwash, then she ended up, AGAIN, going to the store to do some shopping. Is she secretly seeing someone or having phone conversations? I've checked her phone and did see some suspecting numbers, but too afraid to call.
idolno1 idolno1 41-45, M 13 Answers Jul 22, 2009

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Just be frank with her. Come straight out and ask.

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I hear way too many stories about people hooking up with people online behind their spouses backs. I don't want to get you too worried, but I would probably be just as suspicious as you. Has she been wearing different clothes or using a different perfume? Does she seem distant when you're talking to her? Has your sex life been the same? It's not good to jump to conclusions either, so just confront her and tell her you've noticed strange things about her. See how she reacts. If you know your wife well enough, you should be able to tell if she's lieing. Good luck to you

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Explain to her that with how much you love her and how much you have (obviously) invested in your relationship that you deserve to know the truth especially if that's all you've ever given her.

Please make sure that you really want to know the truth though. Be ready for whatever comes. A little denial can be acceptable for the sake of a happy marriage and a happy home. It can also help with your ego.

Myself? I'd want to know ONLY becaues I'm of the mindset of "how dare ANYONE lie to me"- if that wasn't me (and I was afraid to call number listed on my phone statement) I think that truly knowing would do more harm than good...

Please take some time to consider what would be best for you before persuing anything any further.

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first thing i want to say is before you proceed with this advice is.. if trust is gone from relationship then you already have a problem.

LIBERTE I can accept cheating if its with a woman i can completely forgive that aspect.


get on your job pimpin. my gut is saying she sneaking around. how the sex life because if you haven't had any action or it became routine its time to start asking questions or changing your routine to catch her off guard. my advice try going to work like any normal day and show up at a random time without her expecting it to see if you can catch her up to no good. most girls sneak out an 1hr after you leave for work. I know this because I was taught by the best.

good job on the phone #'s but you have to call to them to find out what the deal is. if your too afraid to call then have one of your friend do the deed while listening on the the other end or get yourself a trac phone and dial away to find out the story.

also you need to tell your son to stay out of grown folks business too.thats a hell no in my book when it comes to dealing with the love of your life. a child needs to stay in a childs place end of story.

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If you have noticed changes in behavior it could be she is acting different for a variety of reasons not necessarily because she is seeing someone else. You need to ask her if everything is alright without accusing because if she is not doing anything wrong she will be hurt and angry, and if she is she will likely deny it and then be more careful the next time. It could be that she is just taking some "me" time. It would drive me nuts if my husband went with me to the store to begin with so I cannot imagine any woman wanting her man with her all the time when she shops. And she may be searching for something other than another man on the internet, like information on a health issue or something for someone else. I would have to wonder if you have ever had this problem before with her. Afterall, why all of a sudden are you monitoring the use of her computer, the cell phone records and her time away from the house without having a reason. Could it be you have never trusted her... or perhaps you are just too controlling.

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get out of town for the weekend, pay the money for the investigator- devious, low, yes, but peace of mind is important. yup yup I know all this stuff about trust etc etc, but I've been lied to in my face, been subjected to pouring tears ( no no never not me) and found out otherwise later. no time to waste these days, if you don't want me, just get out of my life, or I'll help you on your way, and if you're confused- take some time out and get back to me when you're sorted ( or don't)

Just be really sure you want to know. Men cannot forgive infidelity as easily as women can ( no offence meant to anyone by this generalisation....) so, if you have children etc think long and hard before you try the first option. or..........take her away for few days and see if you can remind her what she married you for- if she's having an affair, this might wise her up to the fact that you're really the one for her, if she's not- it might improve your marriage win win situation, if she's reluctant to go.....hmmmmm?

ps if she's planning a surprise birthday party, weekend for you , present you're gonna feel pretty bad after, so take your time on these activities.

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Rusted hit it right on the head. Tell her you are suspicious and it's making you uncomfortable to be that way about your wife. Then straight out ask her what is going on. If she is overly evasive it's probably not something you are going to be happy about. At that point you have some tough decisions to make.

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Well, as we get old the memory fails - we forget the silly little things we need from the shops. I'm 44 and do it regularly - stupid things like forgettig to buy milk....I now take my coffee black as a direct result. No doubt she is doing all the shopping too - so has to remember everything? Just a thought.

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Maybe you are letting your imagination run riot. talk to her.

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Woo - wee Holy Othello


Where there's smoke there's fire?

Yar is right...could be a surprise party or gift for you.

Course if you ask her and she up to something, do you really expect the truth?

Key log? is that where you can see everything she types? It give me chills to think that so much trust is gone based on acting strangely.

Nevertheless: I think you either drop a rock...or confirm so you can drop it a rock. See an investigator... pay the $500.00, or whatever, for your sanity...and get it out of your system. Normally I'd tell you it's probably nothing but I can recall 5 or 6 times when my spider sense was right and I only figured it out when I was hit over the head.

Be Cool...keep your head... and Good Luck

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