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RollingFish RollingFish 22-25 7 Answers Nov 7, 2012 in Parenting & Family

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Accept it for what it is. Not everyone reacts the same to every situation. As long as she still treats you with respect you should appreciate the forgiveness they have in their heart.

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What if the friendship between them both is dangerous?

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All you can do is voice your concerns and then move on. As a friend you don't want to see th get hurt but you can't stop it. So you have to decide if this is something you can support or if you have to create some distance for your own sanity. I have had to do this and I just quietly pull back and check in on the person periodically so they know I am still there for them.

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I didn't like her gettin' hit or treated like an object. She's special. Everyone should treat her like she's special. But. I didn't do anything and now she's gone.

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Let it go or cut them both loose. It really is that simple.

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True, true. But I'm sort of seeing a third option here.

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I agree.. Good lesson to learn here is concentrate on who you want to or don't want to forgive and let other people make that option for themselves as well. It will save you many friendships in the future. Though I have noticed that woman are less able to do this then men, woman really do seem to have a need to have the whole group turn on a person.

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Eh, I had a friendship that ended because I ignored the fact that she was still friends with the guy that raped her. I was angry that she was still friends with him and that he'd done such bad things to her, me, and his wife.
But I thought I'd leave her alone to make her own decision. I was wrong.

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That is a bit complex...but from the outside I would say drop them both and move on... I have found that no good comes out of relationships where someone is abused and you try to step in.

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She's still my best friend.

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Nothing - They're big people and it's not their argument it's yours. You cannot expect people to take sides that's unfair.

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What if the friend also hurt them? *grins* Course, this is hypothetical.

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Again it's up to them! They have a head on their shoulders!
All you can do is keep your own counsel. If they ask you for advice make sure it's impartial.

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*nods* mmm. If you think so.

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That happened to me 4 months ago. I have values, and one of them is, a line no one steps over. This is one of them. I dumped my friend. That's how it is for me. If a friend knows someone did something to me, and it hurt and they still hang around with them - that tells me what THEIR values are like. Which means, it doesn't go with my values, so no compromise. I don't see that friend anymore. Good riddance.

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