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Providing we had both opened up to each other about a lot of things and had a great connection, and he even said he loved me, what did he most likely mean by that statement?... I'd think if he lost interest, found someone else or I did something to offend him, he'd just tell me. We'd always been honest and straight-forward with each other.
GuitarGirl19 GuitarGirl19 22-25, F 11 Answers Nov 18, 2012 in Dating & Relationships

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He's not cheating (I doubt it anyway) and he doesn't want to leave you. He has major issues around self worth. You should break it off and tell him to get help.

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Sounds like he's either done something or is afraid he'll do something to let you down.

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It is a mixed message, and mixed messages are always a bad sign. Does he want to be with you or not? That is the question. I think not.

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Exactly. We met online, and he claimed that he was having all these feelings for me after only about a month. We were planning to get together for a date before I go a few hours away to school to see how things go and if a long distance relationship would be worth trying. That was the last convo we had, and he said he'd be offline a couple weeks because he had to get his laptop fixed. I think that was true though, because the picture and sound kept getting messed up on Skype. He's logged on since then, but hasn't written to me or replied to what I sent him.

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That's usually a bad sign, and it means that he either thinks that you are in fact better than him for something he's not letting on or he might want to end it without hurting you - so he's buttering you up first. I could be totally wrong on this front but I'd remain cautious. It could be harmless, or it could mean something.

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He actually had given reasons why he thought I was too good for him, but I usually could talk him down from talking that way. He seemed to not have much self-esteem, but I don't know why he did all this.

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I dated a girl with an inferiority complex before, and she just kept trying to break it up because she felt that I was "too good" for her. She'd distance herself, then say similar things, and generally do self-destructive things to push the relationship apart. He might need serious help to deal with some kind of past traumas or something. Maybe, abandonment issues? I'm not sure but it's not a sign of a strong relationship. You need to view yourselves as equals for any kind of healthy growth to occur.

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He seemed pretty put together but like he just lacked self-esteem. But I could be wrong, because we met online and only talked through chat and face-to-face on Skype.

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If your stuck asking yourself these questions,he wasnt worth your time. Its obviouse that he was only up to no good. Girl respect yourself and find something worth sinkin your claws into! Sry Im just a man hater sometimes and hate when guys tell you one thing and do another. The L word just comes shooting out of some peoples mouths too easily without them ever really knowing the true meaning.

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I thought he said it fast too and asked him why he said that. He said he just felt it at that moment, and I had a lot of things he's always wanted in a girlfriend but hadn't been able to find.

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It could mean a lot of things, but generally when someone says something like that it means that they aren't interested in you and they are trying to be nice about it.

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I know that's what it typically what it means, but he was always so open and always talking about how much he cared and wanted to be with me and little things he liked about me... it's just weird, because it's like he was saying two different things.

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He's cheating

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We weren't actually in an official relationship yet because we live 2 hours apart. And I told him early on that even though things were going well, that if he found someone closer that I wanted him to date her so he didn't have to give up being happy.

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Ah ok, but he could have been a man about it and let you know

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My thoughts exactly. I even wrote him a message saying that I wish he'd just tell me what's going on if he's lost interest or something because I just wanted to know the truth so I can stop wondering and move on. I know he read it, but he never wrote back.

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I know how you feel. The truth may hurt but at least it's the truth. Maybe he's too scared to face it.

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That seems to be what's going on. It's just irritating not knowing what's going on in his mind. It's been 2 months since I've spoken to him, and one month since I sent him that message. I'm pretty sure it's over. I just wish he could have been more honest and direct with me. Most guys I've known have always been more like that, so I dont know what his issue is.

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Maybe it's geared more toward how the other girl is

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it means he did what he set out to do have you thinking about him

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That would make sense, but there were so many times I said I'd miss him, and he'd say not to because he wasn't worth it and didn't want me to think about him so much in case things didnt work out and he didnt want to hurt me. So that's why I'm so confused.

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he's conflicted just ask him directly whats up

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I did. I sent him a message once I realized he'd logged back on after a few weeks. I can see that he read it, but he never responded. He got online again 2 weeks later, but hasn't come back on since then and it's been a month since then.

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I'm not sure what to tell you about that. it sounds like it would be best to meet face to face that way you can tell if he's hiding something from you

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