Unequally YokedI am a christian and their is nothing I look forward to more than the times with my wife of passion and intimacy . We dated in high school and have been married for 31 years sense . She has let her hair keep it's natural gray and not the skinny girl I first dated , but I think she is just as beautiful and exciting as ever . " Rejoice with the wife of your youth " Prov. 5:18
The problem I deal with , is we are unequally yoked on frequency of romance . Every night wouldn't be to much for me ,but once or twice a month is our norm , and now it better than it use to be . She shows more affection. , even though it doesn't go as I would like , I don't feel like I am taken for granted as much . It use to be less .Sometimes two months between on some occasions . We use to fight about it , but that would just add stress and make it worse and resentful . The moments we share are special and intoxicating . In the time of lack , I have had problems with my mind staying faithful to our marriage . Unbridled thoughts and surfing the net , almost ending our marriage . She didn't understand how I could sink so low . If a spouse feels deprived of sex , then the Devil takes advantage ( 1Ch 7:2 -5 ) I never stopped loving her . It started as a little risque and I ended up a deviant . God tried to turn me in the other direction , but I refused to listen .After about four years of playing online , my wife uncovered the truth . She was hurt the same as if I had a mistress . I didn't think of it as bad at the time , but it did the same damage to her . My marriage survived ,but Intimacy and trust is not the same , but slowly rebuilding . Things are different . In some ways better . My sin separated my relationship with God and my wife . I am rebuilding my marriage and am much closer to God . I encourage my wife to feel free to snoop on my history and look over my shoulder when I am online . It gives her peace and gives me strength to keep straight . Some of you may be where I was and just loose hope . I use to say that ," cyber play and taking matters into my own hands was keeping my marriage together , because if not we would fight all the time , if I didn't ." That was a lie from hell . She asked for a divorce , but I refused . She felt Matt 5:28 gave her the biblical right ( Matt 19:9 ) I don't think that is right any more than we should pluck out our eye if we do , in verse 29 . Matt 19:9 gives the only reason to divorce is sexual immorality . The definition , in the Greek , does not include withholding sex from your spouse . I can understand not being able to tolerate the neglect and if a spouse doesn't fulfill their duty ,then they are missing it , but we still don't have a biblical right to divorce . For those of us , who love sex and married to someone who is apathetic , it is hard and hard to stay right with God . Many preachers stay away from this subject of neglect and self gratification is viewed as sin . Seek bible truths for yourself , not just traditional rules past down . That is another long topic . I try to live by 1 Ch 13:4 -8 , especially the first part . " Love is patient and kind "