I lost my husband of 22yrs. 4 yrs. ago. The crying every day grieving is over but now the "what the heck am I going to do w/ the rest of my life" is hitting me. We were very happy. I'm a teacher, he was a post man. We have 2 kids. We're in a church that helped us so much. It is still amazing that he is really gone. After his funeral I received an anynomous call that it was not just a wreck, a young man was trying to commit suicide. There was evidence, it was investigated, but didn't go to court. The young man lived and did a short amount of time in jail. I have forgiven him and did talk to him about it. None of that matters in the big picture because knowing it won't bring my husband back. I know he's in a better place and my kids accept that and I'm proud of them for that. They are young adults. But, I'm just not there. I want him here. I'm a Christian so that helps me deal w/ all this.